Since the beginning of time
by Corrupt Innocence
Summary: Sometimes you just have to open your eyes. YUNALAI. On Hiatus, although rewrite is in progress.
1. Unexpected Events

Yuna peered glumly into the garden of the crowded Café in Luca, a slight frown on her pale face. She stirred a teaspoon of sugar into her foam cup of coffee, gratefully inhaling the scented steam. Placing her spoon onto a napkin, the young woman sighed and dropped her face into her hands, elbows resting on the table. She had barely been there for five minutes and already the overloud voices of the press were becoming audible from the street. Surely, could she just have peace for one day?

_For Fayth's sake…_

Yuna promptly rolled her eyes for even thinking such a thing, whilst hoping she hadn't cussed out loud. Peace was a realistic wish in Besaid, but thinking she could expect the same anonymity in Luca – Spira's Entertainment Capital - was foolish…

_That's what I get for picking a window seat… _she thought, sardonically.

The most persistent of the reporters was a young woman, with very aquiline features and a harried expression. She clutched a microphone in one hand, a coffee in the other and was conveniently flanked by two burly camera men who struggled with heavy spherecorders. Behind her, another three recorders loomed and a horde of excited fans was beginning to amass further down the street. Despite quick and concentrated action by the Café personnel, hook face managed to bustle her way over to the table. Now, over the past couple of years, Yuna had learnt to take a lot less shit then she had previously accepted. Despite this, she simply could not help herself from being largely intimidated by hook face's mannish features for a couple of moments.

"Good morning, High Summoner. I was just, uh, wondering if…"

_I don't have time for this…_

In a somewhat uncharacteristic action, Yuna rose to her feet and scowled.

"No. You may NOT have a word."  
She grabbed her coffee and stormed out into the cold streets, forgetting her coat and remembering only to leave a tip on the counter. Good manners were important to her, after all.

It was wintertime in Luca. The usually sunny town was cold, foggy and downright windy. The clouds that sat like sodden pillows in the sky were so heavy that they barely managed to lumber along overhead. Yuna shivered in her scanty Gunner clothing. She took a long swig of coffee and held it in both hands for warmth. Today certainly was exhibiting a Class One case of 'Spira's Law'. Whatever could go wrong, most certainly would… She wished she had thought to remember her coat, or at least to break in the pair of pants she had bought the other day instead of her damn shorts… Strangely enough, the cold was the last thing on her mind. She was happy to be cold, if she could have quiet. Well, relatively speaking…

The former Summoner was a more than a little surprised when she looked up, to find that her booted feet had walked her off to the Blitzball stadium instead of her hotel room. Thankfully, it was empty – Off Season be praised – so Yuna decided that it would be worth picking a nice little corner to sit in. A nice, quiet, EMPTY corner would suit her just fine. Right down to the ground, even. Putting the coffee down, she rubbed her arms vigorously in an attempt to raise her comfort factor. It only took a few moments for her to realize the futility of her actions. Giving up, she sat, shivered and stared off into space.

_It's no wonder I came here, really. Everywhere I go, there are memories of my journey, our journey. You. I used to think I'd hear your whistle. I thought that you were coming back for me. But now, I guess I know that you're not… You're never coming back, are you?_

Yuna's eyes began to burn. She forced them shut, squeezing her lids as tightly closed as she could, even though it hurt. She wouldn't cry. She _couldn't _cry. Not now...

As she lowered her eyes to stare at her knees, which were largely covered in mooglebumps, small movements on the edge of her vision made her look up. Across the stadium, a familiar figure waved and began to pick their way over, being obviously careful to avoid slipping on puddles that had been left by earlier rainfall. A half smile crossed her face. The Praetor Baralai If she was eternally doomed to company, and it certainly seemed that way, then this was company she would be happy to keep. After a brief wave, she began to cross the stadium to meet him.

It took longer than Yuna had expected, for the two of them to meet near the centre of the rows. She'd forgotten just how large the stadium was and how hard it was to climb stairs when you were out of practice. Finally they stood close together, clothes and hair streaming in the wind.

"Lady Yuna! What are you doing here?" Baralai asked her solicitously, after climbing the last couple of steps to meet her.  
"Oh. I've been doing a bit of publicity for Tobli..." She said quietly, linking her hands behind her back. She was distinctly uncomfortable in the presence of this somewhat august man, especially since they had only met on a few occasions. Not only were they few, but most of them were excruciatingly awkward. Yuna honestly hoped that the few joyous experiences they had could pull them through any painful moments and memories that could surface.

Baralai shook his head, a gentle frown creasing his forehead. He seemed unaware of her timidity.  
"No, no. I meant to enquire as to what are you doing in the middle of a stadium, in the freezing cold. You could get very sick, Lady Yuna."

_I'm going to sound like such a dolt…_

"I-I left my coat in a Café, but there was a bit of a scene with the press. I can't go back there yet..." Yuna whispered, and blushed furiously.  
The silver haired man nodded thoughtfully, as though pondering something.  
"My boat is in the docks. If we hurry, I think we can get there without attracting too much attention."  
Before she could protest or even agree, the Praetor had unfastened the first layer of his heavy arrangement of clothes, and wrapped it round her shoulders.  
Yuna held the heavy garment together at her neck, sighing gratefully, and followed Baralai out of the windy stadium.

Soon after leaving the arena, it began to pour with a vengeance. Thankfully, they were safely on the boat by the time that the sleet began. Lucan weather was _so_ unpredictable, that it was beyond a laughing matter. Baralai assisted his men in hauling up the boarding ramp, but not before he had ensured that Yuna was securely seated and attended to in the main hall.

The Former Summoner shivered in the cloak that was five or so times heavier, since it had gotten positively soaked. Once the servants had gone to the bridge and Baralai had returned downstairs to shelter, Yuna bit her lip gently. She wasn't sure exactly what she wanted to say.  
"Why are you doing this?" she blurted out, rather bluntly.  
When she noticed the hurt and confusion becoming evident in his face, she blushed and quickly continued.  
"I'm truly grateful to you," she blabbered, not wanting to give any more offence, "But we don't really know each other all that well, do we?"  
The young man laughed softly and averted his gaze whilst somehow maintaining a perfectly polite sense about his being.  
"You saved... Bevelle…" He coughed and flushed, a little of the formality dripping away. "I am eternally in your debt, my Lady."  
Despite being convinced that Baralai was not being entirely honest with her, she smiled warmly and spoke honestly.

"It was my pleasure."

There was a brief - although perfectly comfortable - silence. During this time, Baralai seemed to regain his composure, if ever he lost it in the first place. In any case, he turned to look at his guest with a calm face.

"These doors go to the kitchen and conference room." He gestured to the left. "The first on the right leads to the spare rooms. There are two or three of them, I believe. The other is to the lounge." He pointed finally to the big ornate staircase at the far end of the room. "My rooms are up there."

Yuna nodded.

"Okay."

The Praetor paced the room briefly before turning to her, pleased he had remembered what he had meant to say earlier.

"I've had Minna stop by the hotel to fetch your things." He smiled. "If you need _anything_, please don't hesitate to ask."  
"Thank you Baralai." She said, genuinely. "I think I'll be alright."  
As Baralai bowed elegantly, before making his way to his rooms, Yuna realized just how cold and tired she was. She handed her coat to a passing maid and turned to choose a room. Yevon, how desperately she wanted a bath at that moment!

All three of the spare rooms aboard Baralai's boat were beautifully furnished and decorated, but that was only natural, she supposed. It was a hard choice, but she eventually selected the room at the very end of the small hallway. It seemed cosier and further out of the way. Those were perfect traits for her room to have, with all things considered. She couldn't help but smile as she closed the door behind her, a lamp filling her room with a soft golden glow.

"Quiet." She noted, making her way to the bath. After locking the bathroom door, she gratefully removed her dampish clothes and stood in her underwear, feeling the warmth of the ship surround her. As she turned on the taps and poured in a generous amount of bubble bath, she fished out her mini-comm from her belt and set it on the counter top. Taking a seat on the edge of the bath, she dialled Rikku's number.

The air above the mini-comm flickered with light, and a small holographic screen appeared. Surely enough, her bubbly Al Bhed cousin was staring back at her.  
"Hi, Yuna!" She said, adjusting her bikini top. "How have you been?"

"Pooped..." Yuna replied, smiling back. "I'm in Luca at the moment. Tobli likes to run me ragged."  
Rikku frowned slowly, somewhat confused. "Luca, huh? Have they done renovations at the Hotel or something?"  
Yuna shook her head vigorously. "No, I'm on a ship!"  
Her cousin nodded with understanding, and then smiled coyly.  
"Whose ship are you on, Yunie?"  
Yuna felt her throat tighten up and her face flush.  
Rikku frowned slightly and leaned forward to adjust the camera. "Yunie? Yunie, are you  
there?"  
After another few horrible moments of silence, Yuna finally managed to say something  
unrelated and quite untrue.  
" I think the line is breaking up Rikku. I'll be home in a few days. Bye."  
Yuna reached out with trembling fingers and turned the Comm Sphere off.

Removing her underwear, she slid into the huge bath, sighing with contentment. Slipping under the surface and back up again, she leaned back and absently ran her hands through the water in a search for the sponge, whilst pondering her strange behaviour.

_What was wrong with me back there? Maybe I was just feeling cold?_

Finally giving up the search for the sponge, she relaxed and enjoyed the steaming water wafting delicately across her body. She closed her eyes and sank a little lower into the bubbles.  
It rather reminded her of Besaid, on the warmest summer days when she would go to the beach for a swim and then sun bake for an hour or so... She missed it. She missed Wakka, Lulu and Vidina.

_Damn Tobli and his schedule_! She thought, rather viciously. If he _really_ wanted the central expanse for a dance party, he could damn well organize it himself. Nothing would stop her from going home this time.

After an hour or so luxuriating in the warm water, Yuna wrapped herself in exquisitely soft towels to dry herself, before searching the room for her bags. Minna was an efficient person. The bags were right outside her door. After quickly dragging them inside, Yuna donned a delicate silken, rose-colored nightdress and followed suit with a matching robe. She needed to find Baralai...

The main cabin of the ship was dark, so she headed to the lounge. A dim light peeked out from under the door, telling her that the room wasn't empty. Surely enough, the Praetor was sitting in one corner of the inviting room, just as she had hoped. He sat in a large armchair by the far window, staring out at the stormy night sky and choppy seas. His hands were folded demurely in his lap, but he was toying with the tie on his robe. It seemed that he wasn't even aware he was doing it. Yuna took an uncertain step.  
"Praetor?"   
Baralai's head snapped to face her and he jumped slightly as if coming out of deepest thought.  
"Lady Yuna! What can I do for you?" He enquired quietly, dropping the fastening and focusing on her, his eyes still slightly wild.  
Yuna thought for a moment before, striding over and taking a seat in the chair  
beside his.  
"I was just wondering if I could ask you a _teeny_ favour." She smiled, tilting her head to the side, her lips in a small pout.  
Baralai stretched languidly and leaned back in his chair.

"Certainly. I am your servant, my Lady."

The tie on his black robe loosened considerably to reveal a section of his smooth, tanned chest. Yuna blushed furiously for the umpteenth time that day, feeling like a gaudy schoolgirl.  
"I, uh, I'd like to go back to Besaid! I haven't been home in months and I think if I called the airship then I'd cause another scene, but then if I took a ferry I'd get attention anyway and I don't think I could deal with all that pressure right now and..."

Yuna looked up, realizing with a start that she was rambling like an idiot. Never to mind. The Praetor was staring out the window again.  
"I understand your situation entirely. We'll leave tomorrow morning, weather  
permitting it..." He said in a monotonous voice, a kind of hopelessness in his eyes.  
"T-Thank you Praetor."  
Before she could say anything else, he rose, bowed gracefully and left the room.

Yuna dragged herself into bed shortly afterwards. She had to think, and the comfortably soft bed seemed the place to do it. She didn't even know why she was so curious about him, but this quietly spoken man puzzled her greatly. He was very polite and hospitable even though they barely knew each other, but he didn't seem to be a sociable kind of person. Why was he taking an extra special exception with her? And why was she getting this critical over him? She didn't even find him remotely attractive! Well, maybe she did, but in one of those strange, reserved ways…

The Former Summoner scrunched up her pillow and snuggled down into it.   
"Stop it, Yuna! You love TIDUS." She insisted to herself, the hot tears rushing to her eyes.  
She felt a wave of shame wash over her. She should not have been so happy with Baralai today… That was how she used to act with Tidus… She could not betray his memory like that. He just didn't deserve it.

Yuna tossed uncomfortably. Her eyes began to burn with the effort of holding the tears back.

_A memory… Was that all you ever were?_

The next morning Yuna awoke to the sounds of heavily falling rain. She stumbled from the bed, puffy eyed, and wrapped her robe about herself before tidying the bathroom and making her bed. She quickly ran a brush through her hair and exited the room. Swaying slightly in time with the ship she yawned and walked slowly towards the lounge room. It was empty, so she cuddled up in a squishy chair. She was somewhat out of sorts. Last night she had cried herself to sleep only to dream, and it was a dream that had thoroughly confused and excited her. She was now twenty and still a virgin. No sexual experiences, except for when she had kissed Tidus, and that horrible Seymour… Well, Seymour didn't really count. Goodness, how guilty she felt! She wasn't used to those actions, those feelings… She was ashamed of how excited she had felt as she slept, and she was even ashamed of the strange feeling in the pit of her stomach as she remembered her dream. The worst part about it was that deep down she knew that Tidus would never be reunited with her in the way that she wanted…


	2. Coffee, much?

Despite the almost overwhelming comfort of the lounge chair, Yuna managed to force herself up and into the kitchen to grab a coffee to take back to bed. It was strangely therapeutic to make her own drink. She supposed it was, in all honesty, because she still got a real kick out of her independent moments. Yes. It was _refreshing,_ in a word. It almost made up for the fact that she was on four to five cups a day, which was a radical change from her previous, uh, zero. Almost, but not quite. She giggled then, heading back towards her bedroom. There was something almost ironic about it, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Yuna stopped herself in the act of reaching for the door to her room and turned to walk determinedly up onto the deck. It was very cold, the deck was slippery and the wind tore at her clothes and hair but she managed to reach the edge and tip the remainder of her coffee over the edge. It was a satisfying feeling.

There was a murmur of voices and the sound of the bridge door opening and closing again. Yuna spun around, nearly losing her balance on the sodden planks. It was Baralai, with the usual calm and virtually neutral look he seemed to favor.  
"Lady Yuna." He said, bowing politely and holding the door to the cabins downstairs open for her.  
"Thank you, Praetor." She replied gratefully, bustling inside .  
Once he had closed the door, the silver haired man turned to her.  
"Lady Yuna, I apologize, but some rather pressing business in Bevelle has arisen. I can only take you as far as Kilika."  
Yuna sighed inwardly and thought for a moment, whilst appreciatively noticing the feeling returning to her toes.  
"I'm grateful for your assistance, Praetor. Thank you very much."  
Baralai nodded.  
"It is my pleasure, Lady Yuna."

Yuna smiled distractedly, sinking her feet further into the lusciously warm and fluffy carpet. She almost wanted to roll around in it…

Baralai watched her for a moment or two, allowing a small smile to touch his lips.

"Perhaps I could offer you some breakfast, My Lady Summoner?"

Yuna came back to reality with a start and turned slightly pink.

"O-of course! T-that would be lovely!"  
As they walked down the stairs and to the lounge together, Yuna sighed inwardly again. She felt like a bit of an idiot. Still, it could be worse...

Once in the comfort of the lounge, Baralai sent for some breakfast and settled himself into the same chair as he had on the previous night. After staring out at the rain and turbulent seas with a wistful expression, he sent a careful glance over at his guest.  
"What is it like being a Sphere hunter, Yuna? What's it like being able to see the world, and feel things as they really are, without constant responsibility?" He inhaled sharply, and quickly averted his gaze to hide the pink that was spreading across his cheeks. "I'm sorry, my Lady…"

Yuna blushed slightly herself and the words began to just fall out of her mouth.  
"When I was a Summoner, even though I was doing what I wanted to do with my life, it was never about what _I_ wanted. It was about doing what someone else wanted. Always someone else telling me what to do and making the plans. 'Bring us the calm, Lady Yuna.' 'Make us happy again Yuna!'" Yuna broke off and began to nibble at a fingernail. She stood up and walked over to the window. "I wanted to help, believe me, but it was like no one cared that I was going to die! No one cared if I was scared or if I'd changed my mind... Except for my guardians, but none of them really tried to stop me... Except for Ti-... Rikku. Except for Rikku."

Yuna was furious with herself. It was the second time that day she'd gotten all flustered over her memories. Why did she have to torture herself like this? Once again, she wanted to cry and maybe smash a few things, but instead she turned to her host and smiled a fragile, quivering smile.  
"What I meant to say was that I understand."  
With an unreadable expression, Baralai stood up and put his hand on her shoulder.  
"I-.."  
Before he could really even start the sentence properly, Yuna's eyes had filled with tears and she had fled to her room.  
Baralai slumped down into his chair again and, after a moment, he looked out the window to resume his moody contemplation.

Yuna slammed the door and threw herself onto her bed, crying desperately. Why did she have to be stupid and keep doing this to herself? Why did she have to keep imagining all of these 'what ifs' that would never come to pass? Why did go and blab everything out to Baralai, of all people? _Idiot!!!_ Sniffing, she rolled over and lay on her back.

"Why can't I be happy and have a normal life?"  
She thought of the thousands of people she had met throughout her pilgrimage and subsequent travels. They had simple lives. Some of them had never even traveled beyond their nearest temple, despite the advances in Spira's technology. Most had never even seen, much less rode on an airship. They'd never done anything like becoming a Guardian, never defeated Sin or saved the world in another way. They'd never had thousands of people in awe at a concert or given big speeches to the public. They'd never fought big, vicious fiends or people like Seymour who strived for world domination. Most of them had never even killed a piranha at the beach, or played a proper game of Blitzball. Such simple lives, but they were content. They were even, well, happy…

Yuna's thoughts were interrupted by a cautious sounding knock at the door.  
"I'm sorry for the intrusion, My Lady. It's Baralai."  
She sat up slowly and rubbed at her eyes. "The door's unlocked."  
The door opened and Baralai peered around the edge.  
"I, uh, bought you breakfast in case you were hungry." He placed the tray on the table by the door and stood there for a moment, feeling very inept. "I'm sorry about troubling you before..." He clasped his hands together, and resumed his awkward standing. Yuna smiled, despite herself.  
"It's not your fault at all. I think I'm just a bit rundown is all," she gestured to the tray " Are we still having breakfast together?"  
Baralai smiled briefly.  
"Can we make that dinner? I managed to get another full day of paperwork sent to me, via the CommSpheres."  
Yuna nodded understandingly and waved a little when Baralai left the room. She suddenly felt quite warm and lay back onto the bed again. She wasn't too sure whether it was the effects of her stress or something else, she began to feel like even though Tidus wasn't around she could still be happy. Just maybe. It was a nice feeling.  
Baralai closed Yuna's door and leaned against the opposite wall, blushing madly. He couldn't believe he'd just said that! He took a few deep breaths and headed towards his study.

Hearing Baralai walk away, Yuna began to think about him. Naturally. It was strange... She didn't know him all that well, especially in comparison to how she had come to know Gippal and to a lesser extent, Nooj. It made sense of course, since Shuyin possessed Baralai for almost the entirety of 'The Vegnagun Incident.' They hadn't really been able to fight together, or anything. No, that made it even more confusing. If they'd only met on a few brief occasions, then why did she feel like she had known him for, say, a thousand years?

Pushing aside her thoughts Yuna reached towards the Comm Sphere that was resting upon the bedside table and once again dialed Rikku's number.  
A groggy sounding and looking Rikku answered.  
"H'lo? Yunie??! Why do you call me now, huh?" She asked, her blond braids askew.  
Yuna giggled. "It's 8.15, Rikku..."  
Rikku made some unintelligible noises and slid back under her sheets. The Sphere was picked up by Gippal. Yuna blushed furiously.  
"Hey, Yuna babe. What's up?" he asked, holding the sphere and leaning back on the pillows.  
"Uh… I, uh, was calling to tell Rikku that I wouldn't be home until the day after tomorrow..." Yuna averted her eyes from the sphere and twiddled her thumbs.  
"Fair enough, Yuna babe. By the way everything is settled with Tobli... Hey!" Gippal's grin became cheekier and he raised an eyebrow. "That ship, it's Baralai's ship! I want to know what you're doing in a bed, on Baralai's ship, in your underwear!"  
Yuna mumbled uselessly as Gippal shifted over so that Rikku's face was in range of the Sphere as well.

"Hi Yunie! I said you should get with him! Ages ago in Bevelle, remember?!"  
Yuna nodded absently.  
"Bye..." She reached over and switched the Sphere off.

She dropped the sphere casually onto the bed and grabbed the tray. A small basket of fresh scones, a glass of orange juice and a small pot each of honey, jam and cream.  
"Yummy."  
As she ate, she thought about what Rikku had said a year or so ago, in Bevelle. Rikku had been checking out Baralai because of the misunderstood belief that he and Yuna were meant to marry. Even though that had turned out to be a gross misunderstanding, Rikku was still adamant to know what Yuna had thought of the Praetor. Yuna had firmly insisted it wasn't meant to be. What was it that Baralai had said himself? 'I was not the one meant to marry the High Summoner..." Exactly. Yuna popped the last bit of the scone she was eating into her mouth. She felt irritable. For the entire remainder of that day, Rikku _just__HAD_ to remind her of the depressing quality of his voice as he said that. Yuna shook her head.  
"Rikku..."


	3. A connection of sorts

Yuna braced herself and heaved her suitcase up onto her bed. The floor was far less of an efficient wardrobe. She paused to stretch luxuriously, before flinging the suitcase open in a rather overdramatic fashion. It was a relief to find that she had packed some nice clothes, shoes and make up. Not that she wanted to impress anyone of course, but it would be fun to dress up. It had been awhile, as far as she could remember.  
"Fun!" Yuna told herself firmly. "A bit of fun, you know... It's nice to look good..."  
She shook her head and pouted slightly. "Fun…"

The High Summoner frowned slightly and held up the two dresses she'd bought along. One was a long, red satin sheath dress, embroidered in gold flowers that had corset lacing up the back, with gold and red cord. The second was a short, silky halter neck dress of an ice pink colour. The skirt was pleated, and a pink silk sash was tied about the waist. It was a hard decision, but Yuna eventually went with the pink. She decided that it was 'cute' instead of 'sexy' like the red. Her shoes were simple pink ballet pumps. A touch of pink eye shadow and lip gloss, then she was ready. Yuna stopped to inspect herself in the mirror by the door before she headed out. She looked thoughtfully at herself, adjusting the bow that adorned her waist.  
"Why are you this picky today, Yuna?"  
She didn't get an answer, so she opened the door and left.

She strolled down the hallway, simply in order to practice walking in her pink shoes. She was so used to boots that the idea of girlish shoes was ridiculous. They were flat, so it was ridiculous that she was having such trouble. Thankfully, it only took her a couple of laps of the hallway to get it right. Yuna walked into the main chamber and looked around. Empty. He wasn't in the kitchen or the lounge. She crossed the room again and tentatively checked the conference room. Nope. There was a quiet laugh from behind her, as Baralai slowly descended the stairs from his rooms. He paused at the bottom, with a certain style, and flashed a quick grin. The Praetor had discarded his usual robes, and had instead opted for baggy black dress pants and a black shirt with the collar, the next button and cuffs undone. He had rolled the cuffs up to just above his elbows, revealing slimly muscled arms that were just as tanned as his hands and face. His normal brown boots were replaced by smart black shoes and for once he wasn't wearing his customary headband. The Praetor's hair, strangely enough, fell down in sections that looked resembled Tidus's style. Yuna shook her head ever so slightly. Now that she thought about it, it looked more like Shuyin. Definitely more like Shuyin. That cheered her up. She giggled in response to his grin and smiled although it took something of an effort to do.  
"It looks as though I found you first, Lady Yuna." He remarked quietly, leaning on the end of the banister. Yuna tilted her head and clasped her hands behind her back. She couldn't help it. She smiled back warmly.  
"It looks like that, doesn't it?"

A small café style table and two ornate chairs were placed on the upper deck of the boat. The sky had quickly cleared up, for the most part, and the weather was becoming warmer as they neared Kilika. It was nearing sunset, and the sea was stained a radiant gold, all the way to the horizon. Yuna gasped and raised a hand to her mouth. It had been awhile since she'd seen something that was so naturally striking. Baralai also surveyed the view with warm eyes, and offered Yuna her seat.  
"It's one of the things I enjoy about my job. I get to travel the world, meet all manner of people and see all kinds of things. It happened much more frequently before the Crimson Squad fiasco and before I was appointed Praetor, of course... " He sat in his own chair and stared out at the sea, drinking in the sites as if they would have to last him a lifetime. "It's usually all paperwork and meetings with other Diplomats. If you hadn't needed transport, we would probably be halfway back to Bevelle by now. I mean, I don't really get out much any more."

Yuna resisted the urge to giggle. Even though he hadn't meant it in the way that had sprung to her mind, it was really difficult to imagine Baralai 'getting out' at all. He seemed like more of a stay at home sort of guy, not the kind that would go out dancing until dawn. Or on a road trip. What could she really say, though? She didn't know the guy that well. He could be into anything, she supposed.  
"I understand how you must feel." She began seriously, resting her hands on the table. "When I became a Summoner I thought I was going to die, you know. I got to travel the world and was given so many incredible opportunities. Still, when it came time to continue, I was almost afraid because I thought it would be the last time I would..." Yuna paused and a chill feeling settled in the pit of her stomach. "You, You're not going to d-die? Are you?"  
Baralai shook his head and laughed, but it was again devoid of any humour, much like the laugh that she had heard in Bevelle, a long time ago.  
"It's strange Yuna, but when Shuyin possessed me, he brought so much into my life. He gave me a thousand years worth of knowledge and emotions. They were things I'd never known or cared to find out. It was all strangely wonderful to me. I got to see things from an entirely new perspective. Everything was so clear and precise, except this strange feeling and attachment to Lenne..." He stopped and frowned, trying to find the right words. "But not just for Lenne, exactly... Shuyin was the one who felt for her. Instead there was this double awareness, mixed up in his memories. It was so strong and familiar, especially in the Farplane shortly after Shuyin and I encountered you. There seem to be, uh, times when it becomes more palpable."

Baralai caught her eyes for a brief moment before they both looked away. Yuna fiddled with her earring uncomfortably. The strange thing was that she knew _exactly_ how he felt. Almost as soon as Lenne had begun transferring her emotions to Yuna, the thoughts had begun to search for another awareness that was separate to that of Shuyin. Even after the Summoner and her misguided lover had departed to the Farplane at last, _something_ had stayed with her too. Baralai cleared his throat and looked directly at her.  
"It's changed me, Yuna."  
Yuna wasn't sure exactly what to think of his dropping of 'Lady' when he addressed her, but she smiled distractedly.  
"I know..."

The mood at the table was slightly somber and unsociable for awhile, but as the gold stained ocean turned to rose and eventually to night, their mood gradually increased. They passed jokes back and forth, over their food and a glass or three of wine, and eventually the conversation moved to stories from their traveling days.

"There was this one incident that occurred, fairly quickly after we had been assigned into our squadrons for training." Baralai paused to offer Yuna a glass of white wine. She declined uncertainly, having never been an alcohol drinker, so he poured himself another glass and continued.

"You know what Gippal and Nooj are like, don't you? I think that putting them in the same squadron was just asking for trouble. We had a week in the Camp to settle down and socialize with each other, but during this time, Nooj preferred to keep to himself. We basically only saw him at meal times."

"Now, Gippal, being the typical Al Bhed that he is, was like a cat watching a bird inside a cage. He just couldn't bear that Nooj was there, and that he wasn't allowed to have a tinker with his machine parts."

Yuna laughed. "It must have been hell for him!"

"I think it came pretty close to that, yes." Baralai agreed. "Anyway, on the last night in the camp his curiosity got the better of him and he snuck into Nooj's tent. I guess that Gippal's intention was to have a look at the leg, whilst Nooj was asleep. It didn't turn out that way, though…"

Yuna was intrigued.

"Why, what happened?"

Baralai snickered throatily.

"Nooj, uh, had a guest…"

"A g-guest? Oh. Oh my goodness!"

Baralai laughed and wiped a tear from his eye.

"I don't think they noticed he was there, so he just left. He didn't try that stunt again."

More to cover up her embarrassment then anything, Yuna proffered her glass.

"I think I might try some of that wine now."

Eventually they ended up walking laps around the ship and laughing at stupid things. Yuna had found the wine quite delightful, and had almost caught up to Baralai. She was surprised how well he, they, could hold their alcohol. It was almost amusing. After a couple of hours, they stopped by the bow, eating ice cream sundaes. Baralai had loosened up considerably, presumably from all the wine. He finished the last spoonful of his vanilla fudge sundae and knelt quickly to put the bowl on the floor. He stretched and then swung his arms by his side.  
"I've enjoyed my night, Yuna. Somehow you've been able to ask the right questions and give all the right answers. I haven't been able to talk like this in quite awhile."  
Yuna stirred what remained of her strawberry sundae and smiled, thinking back to her Summoner days.  
"It's nice to have someone that actually listens properly."  
She began to feel a little strange again, in this somehow familiar way, so she had another spoon of melted ice cream and syrup, before also putting the bowl down. Baralai swung his arms again and laughed as the wind whipped back his hair.  
"You have..." he said slowly, gesturing to his lips. She stared at him blankly, not understanding. He laughed again, but it trailed off into silence. That was when he hesitantly leant forward and kissed her softly on the lips.

When he stepped back, Yuna stood very still. Baralai flushed an intense red that was visible, even in the moonlight.  
"You had, uh, ice cream..."   
There was no response, except the smallest frown. The Praetor of New Yevon began to stutter, as his rush of emotions overwhelmed him. Something inside him had clicked.

"Yuna, don't go to Kilika. Please. Come with me, to Bevelle!" He asked eagerly, taking her hands in his.  
Yuna stared perplexedly back at him, somehow feeling the same rush. She opened her mouth to answer, before sharply pulling her hands away. Instead of following her instinct and throwing herself into his arms, she found herself backing away and leveling an accusing finger at him.  
"I didn't think you would be the kind of person who would get a girl drunk and try to take advantage of her, Baralai. Obviously I was wrong!"  
She stormed through the door and slammed it behind her.

The dull anger returned instantly to the young Praetor. He walked aimlessly for a few steps, before kneeling and slamming his fist into the deck.  
"Damn it!"


	4. Gullwings, move out!

Yuna stood on the Kilika Dock, her hair and Gunner skirt waving in the fresh morning air. Baralai stiffly walked down the docking ramp, followed by a man carrying Yuna's suitcase. He bowed quickly to the Praetor and hauled the bags to the dock where the SS Winno would shortly depart to take Yuna back to Besaid. The High Summoner and the Praetor had stayed in their separate rooms for what was basically the entirety of the journey and had religiously avoided each other when isolation wasn't an option. The Praetor nervously walked over to Yuna and bowed. She inclined her head in response.  
"Yuna, I didn't mean what I said in that way." He looked her in the eyes, with a mute kind of pleading. "I'm sorry. I would never try to take advantage of you."  
"I know. I don't know why I reacted like that." She admitted, flushing a pretty pink colour.  
The Praetor offered no response. Instead, he reached out and stroked her cheek with a trembling finger. Her eyes widened and she blushed deeper. She tentatively reached up and held his hand against her face for a few moments, before gently stepping away. She looked at the boat sadly and then back at Baralai, who nodded once and lowered his hand.  
"I understand..." He stood tall and strong once again, but his eyes held an obvious injury.  
Yuna felt her eyes grow hot and fill up with tears.  
"I guess..." She inhaled shakily "I guess I'm not as free as I imagined."  
She bowed awkwardly and turned to board the Winno.  
"Yuna…"  
The brunette spun around and the tears finally fell past her delicate eyelashes.  
After a moment's hesitation, Baralai moved forward and wiped away her tears.  
"Take care."  
The next time Yuna looked back towards the docks, her ship was well on its way.

Baralai paced around the main hall of his ship. It had been around six hours since he had said goodbye to Yuna in Kilika. He sighed. He was on his way back to Bevelle and she was nearly in Besaid. Soon they would practically be on different sides of the world from each other. After almost an entire year he had finally understood the feelings that Shuyin's possession had left in him. They had flared up again as soon as he had seen Yuna in the Blitzball Stadium, just as he'd expected, and had continued to burn over the journey. What was he meant to do now?

His train of thought was interrupted by a strange noise coming from the guest rooms. Puzzled, he walked into the hallway and opened the door to the room Yuna had stayed in. Everything was neat and the bed was made. There was nothing obviously wrong. He dropped to his knees and looked under the bed. Nothing! He scrambled to his feet, his headband falling off and ran into the bathroom.

_It's coming from the laundry basket?!_

Quickly dumping the sheets and towels on the floor he rummaged through them and snatched up a sphere. It was a sky blue colour and was circled by a gold band covered in buttons, but the noise had stopped. Confused, he turned the band around until he saw a small screen, nestled between some arrow shaped buttons. Recognition slowly dawned on him. A CommSphere!

It was smaller and more designed for personal use then the one that had been installed in the Bevelle town centre and, more recently, his office. He read the flashing writing on the screen, somewhat surprised.

1 Missed Call: Gippal.

"Gippal?"   
He tentatively pressed the down arrow key on the left of the Comm Sphere. It scrolled through a list of names and places. He pressed the up arrow so it stopped on Gippal's name. A moment later, a green light began to flash. A screen popped up and Baralai silently congratulated himself as the Al Bhed's face appeared.  
"Hey, Yuna Babe, are you... Baralai?"  
Gippal dropped the sphere in surprise, catching it with lightning reflexes.  
"Gippal."  
Baralai smiled sadly at his friend.  
Gippal's holographic face was obviously perplexed.  
"How did... Where's Yuna? She's still with you?"  
Baralai shook his head.  
"No, she has appeared to have forgotten this device accidentally. She caught another ship in Killika this morning. She should be arriving in Besaid soon..."  
"Oh, good. Yo, Baralai? What's wrong man?" Gippal asked, concerned, as he adjusted his eye patch.  
Baralai laughed softly and stared at the screen, his eyes flat.  
"Take good care of her Gippal. I'll keep this safe until it's able to be returned... We had a meeting scheduled in a week anyway..."  
He reached forward and turned off the sphere...

Yuna walked down the dirt road, which led to Besaid Village, dragging her suitcase behind her. She was exhausted and the dust had settled into her hair, clothes and into the tears that had continually fallen since she had watched Baralai's ship leave. It was evening and all the lights in Lulu and Wakka's place were definitely out. Since there was no point in visiting then, she wiped away the tears, placed her hand on the warmth of the Mana sphere and felt it beam her up to Celsius.

She appeared in the Bridge, feeling somewhat dazed.  
"Yunie!" Rikku squealed, jumping out of her capsule and running to hug her cousin.  
"Hi Rikku..." Everything around her was so familiar here.  
Rikku stepped back and examined her cousin.

"You look bushed, Yunie! Go take a bath!" She commanded, taking the suitcase and shoving Yuna towards the cabin, before she could refuse. In the bathroom, Rikku busied herself with bubble bath and candles while Yuna sat on the edge of the bath, faintly amused by the whole process.  
Rikku walked in a circle, tapping her cheek with a finger before squatting down in front of Yuna.  
"So Yunie…" She said with a conspiratorial wink, "How was he?"  
Yuna was confused. She frowned slowly.  
"He? Baralai? What do you mean 'how was he?'"  
Rikku groaned and then grinned mysteriously.  
"You know..." Rikku lowered her voice "In _bed_!"  
Yuna gasped, her hands flying to cover her mouth.  
"Rikku! It's not like that!"  
The slender Al Bhed girl groaned again.  
"Geez, Yunie! You were practically alone with him; in the middle of nowhere on this pretty fab looking ship and all you have to say is 'It's not like that!'? Yunie! He's crazy about you! Yunie? What's wrong?" Rikku jumped up and sat next to the brunette, turning off the water.

Yuna wiped frantically at the tears that began to stream down her face again.  
"Yunie?"  
She figured that her shit factor limit had well and truly been pushed for that day.  
"Rikku, please! I need some alone time, ok?"  
Her cousin nodded slowly and high tailed it out of the room.

Yuna wasn't really feeling any better the next day. She got up late, around noon, and ambled on into the bridge only to be bombarded by suggestions. Well, since everyone was going easy on Yuna they were suggestions. Unfortunately this stage only lasted for around fifteen minutes. Later that day, Yuna found herself in the sweltering heat of Bikanel desert, clearing rocks and miscellaneous debris from the site designated for Tobli's dance party. As she searched and moved, she had a lot of time to think. Paine had always gotten angry with her for doing things that weren't directly related to Sphere Hunting. _This_ wasn't exactly Sphere Hunting but she didn't seem to have a problem with it. In fact Paine hadn't had a problem with it for awhile. Yuna was reminded of a conversation she had once with Tidus, about machina and Yevon.

'My whole life I've followed the teachings and never questioned it. Now that you ask me if it's wrong or not I don't know...'

The brunette wiped away the sweat from her forehead. She'd probably never noticed that the Gullwings had begun doing 'odd jobs' instead of Sphere hunting because no one, until Baralai, had questioned what she did as a Sphere hunter.

When she had run away from Besaid to become a Gullwing, the rush of freedom was amazing. The world suddenly seemed so fresh and new, so exciting and all hers for the taking. Now that she thought about it, it wasn't all that different to being a Summoner. Maybe the end result of Sphere hunting was different to the goal of her Summoner's pilgrimage, but the two journeys were very similar. It was the same enslavement, whether it was the millions of people wanting the calm, Brother or even Rikku. She picked up a rock and threw it as hard as she could towards the rock pile. It was several metres off the target, a single stone alone in a patch of sand. She looked around and saw groups of people. Rikku and Paine. Buddy and Brother. Shinra and Benzo. Yuna looked down at her hands. She suddenly felt very much like the rock. It was thrown wherever someone wanted and it was so terribly alone.

A few hours later, back on the ship, Yuna lounged lazily on her bed. Everyone else was partying on deck but she was far too tired. Paine had attempted to invite her, but it seemed that the mood she was in wasn't inspiring the efforts of anyone else. Eventually Gippal climbed the stairs into the dark room and sat on Rikku's bed, facing Yuna.  
"Ok Yuna, what's up?"  
Yuna stared at the ceiling and went to speak. Gippal laughed, but not unkindly.  
"Don't say 'It's not important either!" He added.  
Yuna nodded abruptly and suddenly began to sob. The Al Bhed man eased himself up and over onto to her bed, patting her shoulder in a comforting manner.  
"It was so strange, Gippal. We barely knew each other, but we got talking over dinner and there was this strange connection. We were having a great time and he kissed me, and invited me back to Bevelle." Gippal nodded thoughtfully and Yuna continued. "I really wanted to go, but I yelled at him instead and said some nasty things..." She sniffed and wiped at her nose. "We made up of course, but I implied that I couldn't go with him because of this. Because of the Gullwings and Sphere hunting. It was my excuse, anyway."

Gippal gave her a hug.  
"That's not all, is it Yuna?" He asked her, his single eye serious.  
She shook her head.  
"I-I never wanted to feel like I do about anyone, except Tidus. I think it's my way of holding on to him and making sure he doesn't die. I've fought feeling for other people for so long, and I'm tired of fighting. I can't help but think that maybe things could work with Baralai. It scares me that the thought has even crossed my mind... Oh Shiva, It scares me..."  
Yuna shoulders began to shake with the intensity of her sobs. Gippal wrapped his arms around her, extremely thankful that Rikku knew where he was and that she wasn't the jealous type. She sniffed again; her voice punctuated every few syllables by a gasp and rush of tears.  
"I don't know how long I can keep playing pretend, Gippal. I love Tidus, and a small part of me will forever, but I can't keep doing this to myself..." She paused, her eyes widening in realisation. "I-I don't want to be a sphere hunter any more!!!" She cried and buried her face in his shoulder.  
Gippal patted her back and spoke quietly.  
"You want to go to Bevelle."  
Yuna looked up at him, her face stained with tears. She blushed rosily and then nodded.  
Gippal stood up and stretched. He thought for a moment, a devious grin appearing on his lips..  
"You should do something for Yuna.." he said, as he hastily scribbled a note, which he put on Rikku's pillow. "Follow me..."

It wasn't too hard for Yuna and Gippal to run over to the makeshift hangar without being seen. Yuna fell awkwardly into the passenger seat of the strange little machina and put on her seatbelt. She swallowed nervously and looked around.  
"What is this thing Gippal?"  
Gippal laughed mischievously.  
"It's kind of like the Celcius, Yuna Baby. It's just a heck of a lot smaller. We're going to Bevelle!"


	5. An unlikely incident

Yuna swallowed nervously and clutched at her seatbelt as the compact air ship shuddered to life. She wished that Gippal would stop laughing, or at least make it sound a little less maniacal, as his fingers flickered over the buttons and switches like lightning. The Machina threw itself forward with a violent shudder, and then began to rapidly pick up its speed. Gippal slammed his fist down on a large red button and they were airborne, the lights and campfires of Bikanel desert shrinking to mere pinpoints of light far below.

It wasn't long before they were soaring above the clouds. Gippal whistled tunelessly and leaned back, controlling the steering wheel with his booted foot. Yuna chose to ignore that particular quirk and stared out the window instead, feeling somewhat queasy. The little airship was relatively fast but it wasn't as smooth or quiet as Celsius or Cid's airship.

After a good hour or so, Yuna decided that flying in the small airship was actually quite pleasant. Gippal's tuneless singing put her at ease, and besides, there was a kind of electric buzz that she got from soaring through the air in the small contraption. It was kind of like riding on the front of Celsius. Yuna quietly laughed at herself. She'd ridden on the front many times before, so why was she scared now? Outside the circles of her contemplation, Gippal flicked a couple of levers with the toe of his left boot and gestured to the window.

"Yuna, have a look at this."

Yuna leaned over and peered out the window. The ship dipped below the clouds, until it was flying just above the calm surface of the sea, and fine droplets of water were thrown up into the air. They glittered in the moonlight like a shower of diamonds.

Gippal smiled confidently.

"Now this is the life."

The former summoner, who was wrapped up in the picturesque surroundings, gasped in delight as a school of silver dolphins broke the surface and leapt out the water from underneath the moon's reflection. She giggled and began to fiddle with the lock on her window, in an effort to be closer to them. As the lock swung free, Gippal glanced at her.

"We need to keep that one closed, Hun. This baby needs to go too high to have the window open."

Yuna blushed and pulled the window back up. It wouldn't budge. She tugged on the handle a good deal harder. Nope, that didn't work. Finally she undid her seat belt and tugged with all her strength as the plane slowly ascended.

As the head of the lock slipped over the catch, there was a bright red flash on the right wing, accompanied by a rather loud noise that was quite similar to that of a firaga spell. A moment later and the airship veered briefly to the right hand side.

Gippal clutched the steering with both hands as Yuna picked herself off the floor, and managed to shut the window that had been knocked open by the jolt.

"Put your seatbelt on" Gippal said firmly.

"But the window..."

Yuna was cut off by another explosion. The plane began to rise steeply and pitched to the left.

"DO IT NOW!" Gippal screamed at her, a vein standing up on his forehead as he struggled with the steering wheel and additional controls.

A second later Yuna was in her seat and was vainly trying to fix her seatbelt with shaking hands, hardly able to see through the tears that had welled up in her eyes.

"G-Gippal, my belt it won't..."

There was another explosion that cut off the power cables and the ship shuddered violently once more, before going completely silent.

"Cred!"

The ship dove sharply and despite Gippal's efforts, it hit the water nose first.

Yuna opened her eyes and screamed with pure terror. She was winded and her lungs struggled for breath. She felt a few steady streams of blood flowing unchecked, from her head and stomach. It was totally black except for a few rebelling lights that blinked from what was left of the controls. When she looked out of the windows, it was increasingly impossible to see the sky. They were sinking quickly. Aching, Yuna tried to get up but found herself pinned down.

"Gippal! She yelled, struggling fruitlessly.

The Al Bhed groaned and pushed a pile of debris from his legs. He was bleeding too. He leapt over a pile of twisted metal, and began to tug on the beam that was pinning her to the seat.

"I'll get you out,Yuna!" he promised, through a gasping breath.

With a gut wrenching sound, Yuna's window flung open and the water began to pour into the small cabin. She screamed and began to struggle, crying and pushing at the metal that was holding her down. Gippal swore and worked harder to shift the load. Inexorably, the water rose higher and Yuna struggled to keep her head out of the water.

"Help me!"

"You have to hold on for just a moment!"

Yuna felt the salt water burn her sinuses as she accidentally breathed in as the salt water began to splash against her lips.

"Take the deepest breath you can, ok?" Gippal's voice was as calm as he could possibly manage.

The water was rising steadily.

The pressure in her lungs grew greater and greater. Finally she breathed in.

She's always had the remote fear of drowning in the back of her mind for some reason. Perhaps it came from growing up on an island. There was always water around. And sailors. They always horrified the local children with their terrible tales. She had always felt that actually drowning would feel somewhat different though. It was still burning, as Yuna struggled against it; trying desperately to remember all the training she'd done on holding her breath. She couldn't even begin to pull oxygen from the surrounding water, not while she was like this. Slowly her vision began to mist over, and her eyes closed involuntarily.

_It's dark._

_I can't see anymore._

_Is this the end?_

_No, not yet._

Somewhere beyond her reality, she felt a burning pressure behind her eyes. She knew she was crying, even as the water claimed her body for its own. With a kind of final desperation, Yuna cast her mind back over her memories...

_It can't be over._

_I've tried so hard to do the right thing by everyone._

_I can't let my friends down, not like this. _

_Lulu, Wakka, Rikku… _

_Tidus._

It was becoming a little harder to think now, but she still clung to her memories like a childhood toy.

_He saved me._

_Was it in vain?_

Somewhere inside her, all the training from her Summoner years kicked in again. After a few moments the compulsion to fight began to fade away and Yuna felt calm and even peaceful.

_No. He saved Spira as well._

_We both gave so much to these people. Maybe I wish I could have done more for me... Maybe this is for me._

Within her mind she saw the faces of her friends, all smiling. She smiled back at them and felt a strange tearing sensation of regret.

_Baralai?_

She saw his face in her mind, smiling and glowing with the light of the fading sunset.

_It could have been nice, right?_

Yuna felt braver now. She'd reached a resolution to all of her problems. Her Summoner mentality completely took over. She was ready to die.


	6. Devestation: Part 1 of 2

The darkness slowly began to shift. Yuna blinked rapidly, trying to speed up the process. It was almost overwhelmingly frustrating.

_There's no pain?_

No pain, or physical feeling. There was just light. A blinding light that was completely white and pure. It slowly enfolded her with a barely audible whisper of sound. The light was soothing and reassuring, but it was completely something else altogether.

_I'm dead?_

Then there were misty silhouettes, slightly edged with colour. There were so many people. She didn't think she'd ever seen so many. So many feelings were flying rampant in the air. There was so much noise. Everyone had a story to tell, if she would only listen. She smiled apologetically, feeling the light stream around her. It intensified in brightness and song, enclosing her until there was nothing left.

Nothing except…

"Father?"

Braska was a tall and handsome man, clad in heavily embellished ceremonial robes. His large eyes were benevolent and full of love as they gazed at her. She made a quick mental comparison to the static image that used to appear in the farplane, but dismissed that quickly. Here, her father seemed almost, well, _alive_.

A few seconds slowly ticked by as she stared back, until there was a sudden shimmering at Braska's side. It was, of course, her mother. Yuna's jaw dropped and her hand reached forward involuntarily. She had never seen her mother like this in Guadosalam. The ex-summoner could swear she could smell the perfume she used to wear, and the gentle spices commonly used in Al Bhed cooking. She even looked warm and soft, like a mother should, and there was a gently translucently to her skin that made her glow. She was beautiful.

"Mama…"

Yuna retracted her hand regretfully, a deep seated regret welling up inside her. Why should she be able to touch her this time? It was with that thought that the unthinkable happened. Her mother's smile widened and she stepped forward to embrace her daughter for the first time in almost twenty years. Braska enfolded both of them into his arms.

"I missed both of you so much!" Yuna sobbed into her mother's shoulder. She didn't feel anything now, except for her parent's embrace and the strange light that had bought her here.

"We missed you too, sweetheart." Her mother told her, her voice gentle and slightly accented, "We've both been so proud."

Yuna's face twisted into a bittersweet smile, and her voice faltered a little.

"I guess it's finally over now, though. I think," she paused "I think I'm glad."

There was a brief, startling moment when she became distinctly aware of her mother holding her close, and her father's face pressed into her hair. She could almost feel her mother smile.

"What makes you think that it is over, my love? I would say that it's only just beginning, myself."

Then there wasn't anything, except a thought.

"We love you, Darling."

And then there was pain. Like lightning, Yuna's senses returned to her all at once. Her lungs began to burn like molten fire, as the rest of her body prickled painfully with the cold. Somewhere in the darkness, there was the sensation of lips being pressed against her own. They were beautifully warm, and she couldn't hold back a cry when she felt them pull away from her. An agonized cry answered her own, and she felt hot drops of water rain down onto her face, seeming to scorch right into her skin. They were _tears_? Her own burning tears of gratitude ran from her eyes now, as she realized who had saved her. Gippal.

Yuna's body jerked violently of its own accord and she began to retch, her lungs clearing themselves of the salt water that seemed to burn as it ran down her neck. It was only then that she realized she was partially underwater. With immense effort, Gippal dragged her from the partially submerged wing, and up onto the shattered deck of the ship that was miraculously afloat.

Trembling violently, Gippal pulled Yuna into his arms in an effort to keep her warm. She managed to open her eyes, and looked up into those of her rescuer, his face pale with blue tinged lips. Yuna felt vaguely shocked, somewhere deep in her consciousness, as she realised that the Al-Bhed man had lost his customary eye patch in the wreckage. One of the eyes that stared back at her was a glistening white, with no pupil.

"I thought you were dead..."

Despite the pain, Yuna smiled strangely as her vision began to cloud over again.  
"I was."

She coughed harshly once more and sighed, her eyes sliding closed. 

Gippal touched his fingers to the side of her neck, fear tightening his chest. He was relieved to find a pulse, even though it was faint. The alternative was definitely far worse. At least they still had a chance. He fumbled in his pockets for his Commsphere, thinking longingly of the Celsius. He was partway through dialling Buddy's number when the realisation hit him. It was hopeless. Celsius was definitely the fastest airship in existence, but it was plonked right in the middle of a camp that would have to be cleared first, or else levelled, before it could take off.

Gippal clutched Yuna to him and stared at the sky, suppressing the overwhelming urge to scream. Trying desperately to stop the sobs which had begun to shake his body, Gippal checked their coordinates on the Commsphere. It was a long shot, but with faltering fingers he dialled in Yuna's number.


	7. Devestation: Part 2 of 2

Gippal sat in the lounge room of Baralai's luxurious ship, staring out of the misty window at the malevolent looking ocean. He'd always enjoyed being around the ocean, especially after a long stint in Bikanel, but now his feelings had changed rather dramatically. The water didn't offer relief anymore; it now seemed to fill his insides with ice.

Despite the crackling fire, the heavy blanket pulled round his shoulders and what seemed like a bucket of steaming herbal tea, he still felt cold inside. Empty. There was no way he would be able to relax, and sleep was definitely out of the question. He knew what he would see when he closed his eyes.

Gippal stung viciously with guilt, and a bewildering kind of defeat. He was an Al Bhed through and through: an ace with Machina and other contraptions of all sorts. He was reputed as a top notch marksman and was one of the few Al Bhed gifted with a flawless safety record. Until now, that was. The worst part about it all was that the accident was entirely his fault.

The Al Bhed inhaled the strong, scented steam that rose from the cup, before putting it back down on the table and letting his golden head drop into his hands. His success and degree of fame had made him overconfident. Evidently it was a confidence he didn't deserve to possess. He'd been reckless and had showed off. If Yuna died, he would never be able to forgive himself, much less ask for the forgiveness of his friends.

Slamming his fists on the table, he rose from his seat to begin pacing around the room. It had been nearly two hours and there had been no news of any kind. Clutching at his side, which had begun to ache, he hoped fervently that he had done the right thing by calling Baralai. He didn't think there was anything else that he could have done. There was no radar in his Commsphere. He couldn't possibly know who else could have been around, to reach them faster.

It had taken half an hour or so for the ship to reach the wreckage. Gippal was amazed. He'd never seen a lump of wood go so fast. Even in the light of the moon, he could see the sail snapping in the wind, the mast bending to the point where it should surely have snapped. It seemed like lucky chance, or something more mysterious, that Baralai's ship was in the area. If they'd taken another few minutes to get there, he didn't know what would have happened to Yuna or himself. He dry retched suddenly, the pain forcing him to collapse back into his chair.

It was about then that Baralai entered the room. The Praetor's olive complexion was unusually pale and his eyes were hunted and empty. Gippal looked up, his questions obvious in his face, and wiped the veil of perspiration from his forehead. Baralai looked as awful as he felt.

"She's alive, but they won't let me see her..."

Baralai slumped against the door frame and dragged himself to the nearest chair.

"They won't let me see her..."

Much as Gippal had earlier, Baralai let his face drop helplessly into his hands. He tugged uselessly at his silvery hair, his ragged breath clearly audible from across the room. Gippal sighed and stared resolutely at the ceiling, an ugly lump growing in his throat.

"It's entirely my fault, B." The Al Bhed whispered. "I was showing off and I guess I was being careless. I was far too reckless."

His usually cocky voice cracked.

'I'm sorry."

As Gippal spoke, Baralai's head had slowly risen from his hands. His knuckles were white from clutching the armrests, and a vein was fluttering visibly in his neck.

"You said what?" It was an ugly voice. Neither of them registered it as being Baralai's own.

Gippal continued to look upwards, anxiously avoiding his friends gaze.

"You heard what I said, Lai."

Baralai stood up slowly, his stance very upright and strong.

"You were showing off?"

Gippal nodded after a long moment, and swallowed.

A small frown creased Baralai's forehead, and he clenched his fists angrily.

"You were a little careless, you say?"

Gippal somehow managed to incline his head jerkily, as Baralai took a few solid steps closer.

The silvery haired man laughed a soft, and rather ugly laugh.

"Reckless, huh?" His voice was dangerously low.

There was a moment of perfect silence, before Baralai reached forward and tore Gippal out of his chair, by the scruff of his jacket. The Al Bhed's cup and saucer was knocked askew and the teapot fell directly onto the floor, shattering on impact. Still staring resolutely at the ceiling, Gippal winced. He was covered in sweat from the injury to his side, but he was determined not to show that he was in pain. Only Baralai's torn breath and the fragrant liquid cascading onto the floor broke the silence.

Baralai shook Gippal roughly, his eyes narrowing.

"Reckless." he spat, as though it was a taboo word that dripped with filth.

Nothing.

The tea had slowed to a drip, like the persistent hands of a clock counting down to its inevitable conclusion.

With a wretched scream Baralai lifted Gippal up, and slammed him violently against the wall.

"Yuna might _die_, Gippal! She might die because _you_ were feeling _reckless_!"

Nothing.

Baralai released one of Gippal's shoulders from his grasp, and swung a fist violently at the Al Bhed's face. It connected with a clearly audible thud.

"LOOK AT ME, YOU BASTARD!"

Still, there was no response. Baralai raised Gippal up and slammed him against the wall once more, but the sheer vehemence was gone.

"Look at me, damn you…"

Gippal slowly let his gaze drop to match the eyes of his assailant, trying to hide his sudden fear.

"We were on our way to Bevelle, to see you."

After that moment of eye contact, the Praetor's breaths became increasingly fractured and stressed. A second later they were punctuated by harrowing sobs. Shaking, he lowered Gippal to the floor and released his grip on his friend's clothes. He took a few steps back and collapsed onto the floor beside the remains of the teapot. Gippal fell ungracefully against the wall, a moan of pain escaping his lips. Baralai's strike had caused his lip to split open, and blood had begun to stream from the wound.

"I-I'm sorry, Gippal. I'm so very afraid."

Gippal stood silently, pressing his hand against his side. He could hardly bear to see the look of despair on his friend's face. The Al Bhed wiped pointlessly at his wound, with a deep sigh, and foundered beside his companion.

"I know, Lai. There's nothing for me to forgive. I should be the one apologizing to you."

They sat then in silence, staring at the pool of tea that had mingled with the blood that had been spilt.


	8. Without Answers

It was now early hours of the morning, around two or so. The sky was pitch black and the rain had begun to pour again as the boat flew across the seas towards Bevelle. Gippal and Baralai were still in the lounge, although they were now rugged up in an armchair each and the room was cleaned of any evidence of the fight. Gippal had been diagnosed, by Baralai's personal doctor, with a broken rib and was well bandaged. He was suspected of having a milder case of hypothermia and also sported a couple of stitches in his lip. Baralai was better off, with light bandages for his cut knuckles. Despite their weariness they refused to go to bed, instead they forced themselves to stay awake and drink coffee so that they would be there if anything changed. The minutes ticked on, and the boat was anchored in the cove of a small, remote island to wait until the storm died down a little. Shortly afterwards Celsius landed in the water beside them.

The Gullwings filed in onto the ship and were seated by helpful staff and handed cups of coffee. Buddy and Brother were strangely silent and not their usual dynamic selves, although Brother had several marks that suggested that the silence was beating induced. Paine was increasingly grave with a look of intense worry on her face, her red eyes glassy. She was showing her affectionate side by cradling Shinra on her lap and humming in what she hoped was a soothing manner. The little kid was distraught. He wasn't the most emotional kid anyway, but all of his scientific practices hadn't prepared him for this. Rikku came into the room, like a zombie. All of her usual verve was lost. She was pale and stumbled blindly into Gippal's arms, a few tears sliding down her cheeks. He adjusted her position gently so she wasn't pressing on the bandages and stroked her braids.

Everyone sat together in silence with the flames casting eerie shadows across their faces. They were all experiencing mixed emotions. If this had happened before the final vanquishing of Sin, everyone could have found comfort in praying to Yevon for Yuna's good fortune. They knew now of Yevon's folly, but with that knowledge was the lack of security. As Daylight appeared Brother, Buddy and Shinra grudgingly flew Celsius back to Bikanel Desert to complete the job. Rikku had long since fallen asleep and Paine was nodding off. Baralai eased himself out of his chair and stumbled out of the lounge, through the main cabin and up onto the deck. He ignored the pelting rain that had started up again and was stabbing into his skin like daggers in Shiva's icy grip. Step by step he crossed the slippery deck until he was right up in the Bow. He clutched the railing in his hands, feeling the cold metal plating bite into him.

Baralai closed his eyes and felt the wind and rain tear at his hair and clothes like ravaging fingers. He pressed his mind through the levels of his consciousness and self-consciousness, the memories and dreams flying past him in fast forward. Then there was black. Baralai didn't understand... Shuyin used to be here, waiting. Feeling helpless, The Praetor wrenched vainly at the railing. He'd cursed the damned double awareness before, but now that he needed it, It wasn't there. It was a serious case of 'Be careful what you wish for' or 'You don't appreciate what you have until it's gone.' He needed strength. He needed unyielding determination. He needed the faith to fight against the odds, to keep fighting until he was utterly spent if need be. He needed to know that any risk can, and should, be made to make his love span the ages... That no matter what he might lose, the rewards would be infinitely greater. Baralai knew that Shuyin possessed this knowledge and he wanted it. No, it was more then that. He _needed_ that knowledge. Baralai stepped back from the railing, feeling strangely satisfied. Maybe his knowledge he had ever obtained from Shuyin was just a spark, but he knew well from an unfortunate childhood misdemeanour that even a spark could cause a bonfire if it had the right fuel.

After changing into dry clothes Baralai returned to the lounge, noting Paine and Rikku had succumbed to the urges of sleep and gone off to the guestrooms. Gippal glanced at him once and looked back at the ceiling, obviously trying to look inconspicuous. There was an awkward silence for a few moments, but Gippal stood up and scratched the back of his neck.

"I , uh, I'm off to bed..." He said, looking slightly to the left of Baralai's face, before cautiously edging around him, to the door.

Without looking back, Baralai spoke.

"Sleep well."

Gippal stopped briefly.

"You too."

Stepping out of his steaming shower, Gippal wrapped a towel around his waist and began rubbing a towel through his blond mop of hair. He paused in front of the mirror to wipe off the condensation. Grimly he stared back at his reflection. One electric blue eye and one milky white eye stared back at him. He swore inwardly at the loss of his eye patch. He hated that hideous blank eye, but the thought of a glass eye... Never. He vaguely remembered being the victim of an unfortunate virus that had invaded home when he was 13 or so. It was a particularly vigorous disease and he was lucky when he thought about it. The curious trait of the disease was that even though it wasn't particularly deadly, it left sufferers with some kind of disfigurement. Some people suffered from pigment changes and developed patches of extra dark or extra pale skin or had radical hair colour changes. It was responsible for the well-known fondness between Al-Bhed's and their tattoos. Some suffered some more serious forms of disfigurement in their features, so Gippal was thankful for the fact that he was untouched, except for that damned eye. Looking away, he pulled on his boxers and dried his hair some more, before climbing into bed with Rikku.

Gippal was tired and running on borrowed time and the bed was warm and comfortable, but he just couldn't sleep. He shifted a few times to make his rib comfortable before linking his arms behind his head and settling down. He just didn't understand why the Machina had crashed. It was an uncomfortable realisation for Gippal, that it was actually his fault. It must have been him. After all, It was only the week previously that Rikku had offered to service the mini air ship, personally. Rikku was definitely a true daughter of the Al-Bhed, with her intimate knowledge of Machina mechanics. Gippal shifted uncomfortably. When he'd lost the vision in his disfigured eye, it hadn't taken that long for him to regain all of the skills that had been weakened by the virus's effects. He re-learned to judge depth and distance and quickly became a master shooter again. He also had the added advantage of not needing to squint to use the scope. He could hover with the best of them and had passed his flying test with flying colours. Could it be possible that everyone had given him too much credit? Did Gippal have undeserved faith in his own abilities? As Rikku whimpered in her sleep and snuggled closer to him, tears squeezing out from between her closed eyelids, Gippal began to think about finding another career choice. He didn't think he was safe around Machina any more.

* * *

A/N: I know this fiction is about Baralai and Yuna, but there is a point to all of this Gippal-ness. I swear.

:: Cowers::


	9. When I look back

Baralai undid the ties of his heavy cloak and carefully pulled it over his head. Once it was off, he dumped it on the floor with a feeling of definite relief. It was an awfully heavy garment and he wondered why he'd kept it on for so long. The feeling was beginning to resemble the weariness of carrying a person on his back all day and Baralai was perfectly aware that his slender frame was regarded as a source of amusement by many people who didn't really know him as well as they could.

Shrugging his shoulders to relax the tensions in his shoulder muscles, he sat sleepily into his bed and kicked his boots off. Expressing his relief with a sigh from deep inside him, he flopped backwards and pushed himself to the centre of his bed. His overtaxed body sank into the soft mattress gratefully and his eyelids closed of their own accord, but he couldn't sleep. Baralai had experienced many things in his relatively short life so far, but this was definitely a stretch of unexplored territory. He didn't understand it. He didn't understand himself. All his life he'd been the scholarly type, being a deep believer in learning and shutting himself away in his study with piles of ancient books and scrolls. Quite frequently it had been for days at a time. He had delved into Martial Arts and Music and had achieved at high levels but his true passion was that amazing feeling of wonder at finding out things he didn't know, that there would always be something new around the corner... Baralai frowned. All the self-analysis wasn't really helping him understand anything. There was no doubt that his feelings were just one of things that used to be hidden behind yesterday.

All of the lectures and pep talks he'd been giving himself seemed to fade away and he began asking the same old questions he'd been asking for the last couple of days. Why? Why the hell not? Why couldn't he see everything and nothing all together at once. He tried to embrace non-linear time and push himself away from the concept that time was chopped up into the little pieces, created to make humans feel significant. There was more to time then minutes, hours and days. Baralai frowned again and attempted to move his leg while trying still to rationalise his feelings. There was a definite low to living a scholarly life... He could ramble on about the continual flow of time, he could use his possession by Shuyin as an excuse but he couldn't ignore the fact that so much depended on Yuna. Inside he ached when he realised that he didn't really know how she felt inside at all.

At their parting of ways in Kilika, she had been polite, albeit a little cold at first. But then again he behaved exactly the same at that time also. They were just the mere influential figures that they were, as if in a business meeting. It was entirely different from they way they had interacted during their dinner-date a couple of nights earlier. Baralai sighed in reflection. There had been that curious rush of energy that had come from nowhere and seemed to make his tongue run away and his feet stumble. The impulsive kiss and his forward (but innocent) suggestion had seemed perfectly rational as if he had thought them over for a thousand years. He knew Yuna felt the same then. He knew it as soon as he had softly brushed her neck with his fingers as he leaned in to kiss her. That same energy fuelled by dreams, passions and hopes filled her body too. It seemed like endless years since that night. Even so he wouldn't forget how he felt for a very long time, if he would forget at all. It was with a start, Baralai realised that he had felt that way once before in his life.

He hadn't remembered all that much until now for some reason, although it loomed quietly at the back of his consciousness. That brief interlude in the Farplane before he had opened the portal to where Vegnagun was kept. He'd approached Yuna and told her he'd been searching for such a long time for her and that they could finally be together as well as things he chose not to think about. He'd held her in his arms for awhile and it was that moment when he managed to resist possession just for a little while. Perhaps it was those extra few moments that gave Spira the time it needed... Inside Baralai knew that it was Shuyin speaking to Lenne, but they were borrowing Yuna's body and his own after all. He even began to understand why Shuyin had possessed him in the first place. Maybe Shuyin wasn't as different from him as the Praetor imagined... Aching, Baralai realised that Shuyin was once filled with hopes and dreams of his own that were torn apart by a few moments of confusion.

It was 10.00 AM. The silvery haired man was shocked to find that he'd managed to sleep for four hours straight. He was wise enough to admit he'd felt better on days where he'd managed the same amount of sleep spread out over almost a week, but it was still sleep. His head ached and felt slightly lighter than a slab of lead. That feeling of heaviness and pain could be applied to his entire being. Baralai dragged himself out of his bed and rubbed at his deep brown eyes that were slightly marred by the presence of 'sleep'. He had to see her. He didn't care that the Physicians said "No Visitors". A little flame began to burn behind his navel and he stumbled out of his room, feeling stronger. Fuel.

The physician who worked on his ship when it was sailed out of port was all too happy to step out of the way, her eyes wary and slightly fearful, much as Gippal had been after their scuffle. This was easier than he expected it to be. Baralai did feel slightly guilty though... He had always been a kind, quiet and a benevolent leader. But now he would have a lot of apologising to do by the time they reached Bevelle. Still, while he was on a role, he might as well ride the wave out. It was a lot more efficient to his causes than an hour of pleading to no avail could ever be. Or something like that...

His thoughts left him almost entirely as he saw her for the first time since he had helped Gippal pull her out of the icy water. The sheets were pure white but next to her slender, pale body they looked darker. His eyes took in the many bandages and bruises and the pale blue cast to her lips. Silently he surveyed the several machina that surrounded the headboard. She looked so small and vulnerable there. The nurse who was attending Yuna glanced at the monitors of the machina before leaving respectfully. Trembling as if he was a child in trouble, Baralai approached the bed and sat by her side. Not really sure about what he should say to her as she lay in her unconscious state, he took her hand noting how pale and cold it was. Looking into her face, he fought back tears or worse by stroking her hair with the other hand.

"Hey Yuna." He began, choking a little.  
"It's me... Baralai... I thought you might be lonely in here, by yourself. Or bored... or something..."  
He found it hard to talk to her, without those gently piercing eyes gazing up at him. "Everyone misses you. Rikku, Paine, Gippal... They're here waiting for you. So was Brother, Buddy and Shinra. They've gone to finish things at Bikanel Island. They said they would pick up Wakka, Lulu and Vidina and meet us in Bevelle as soon as possible..."

Baralai shifted awkwardly.

"I know you didn't want to go to Bevelle with me, but were heading there now to make sure you get well. They'll have you better in no time..."

He was so tired still that he nearly fell from his chair, but he pulled himself up and lifted Yuna's hand to his cheek.

"I'm sorry for the other night Yuna, but I don't regret kissing you or asking you to come with me. I'm just sorry that it's not what you wanted." He kissed her hand and stood up. "I want you to know that I'm here for you and that no matter what it takes, I'll keep giving to you even when I have nothing left to give..."

He replaced her hand on the soft covers and returned back to his room. It wasn't until he was back in bed that he cried.


	10. I love it but I hate it

It was around four when everyone dragged themselves out of bed in an attempt to regulate their sleeping hours. They agreed that while it sounded cruel, just because Yuna was down and out for awhile, their responsibilities didn't diminish. They could probably argue that they increased a little. Rikku and Gippal could also argue that they didn't keep regular hours anyway, for various reasons, but they did think that if they did have to get up, they would rather spend it in the best company. Baralai and Gippal avoided each other's gazes religiously, but the Praetor eventually set down his pride for the time being and politely withdrew to a corner with the Al-Bhed. He then wrung his hands nervously, his eyes low.

"I'm sorry Gippal. We've been through far too much together to be mad at each other. You know Yuna much better than I do and I know you wouldn't intentionally harm someone that you care about." He raised his eyelevel apologetically. "I have to admit that I was hurting and I needed someone to blame and I guess you kind of volunteered indirectly, but I had no rights whatsoever to do what I did. Forgive me." His cheeks were flaming by then.

Gippal reached out and clapped him good-naturedly on the shoulder. He glanced quickly at Rikku before speaking.

"I would have done the same thing, B."

He sighed and scratched the back of his neck.

"I'm giving up on the whole Machina thing, you know?"

Baralai was stunned. Taking advantage of the silence, Gippal made a vague, contemptuous gesture to his blind eye and tried to laugh.

"I'm gonna let Rikku know now."

He nodded, to reassure himself, and sauntered away.

There was a gentle touch on his elbow. Paine, with her face a mystery but her deep red eyes were filled with pain, fear and all the nasty things Baralai felt.

"Hey" she said, leaning against the wall. "I thought I'd see how you were holding up."

Baralai smiled weakly.

"And you Paine? How are you holding up?"

Paine ran a gloved hand through her hair, a frown on her face.

"I guess I feel that I don't know how to feel. I never expected this at all. It's Yuna here... She's always the one that picks us up off the ground. I never thought I'd see her not landing on her feet..."

Paine sniffed an indelicate sound.

"I'm not sure what to do."

Baralai reached out and hesitantly put an arm around her, in comfort. It was a little strange that he was feeling so odd. Paine was, of course, a best friend; but ever since he had found out that her feelings towards him went way past that of a friend he felt he had the right to be just a little freaked out. But that wasn't the source of his hesitation. At that moment he was also strangely jealous of Paine, Gippal and Rikku for sharing moments in Yuna's life that he wouldn't... couldn't know. He silently continued his observation of the ocean with Paine. After a little while, he sighed.

"Maybe I don't know Yuna that well, but I'm going to make sure that she finds her feet again."

He didn't know why he said it, but he did. Paine turned to face him. Paine was now openly confused and teary, her unasked questions being screamed by her eyes. Her lips parted slightly and she reached out to him with a quivering hand. Baralai took her hand and looked at if for a moment, before squeezing it and placing it by Paine's side. Uncomfortably he shifted his gaze to her eyes, answering her questions firmly. The warrior flinched and stepped back from him, her lips now pursed tightly together. Baralai felt his stomach wrench. He had really become a person he hated over the last few days. His face began to redden once more.

"Paine, I..." His voice crackled.

Paine stood up tall and proud to mask her feelings.

"Save it for someone who gives a damn, Baralai."

Her voice wasn't exactly working right either.

She turned to walk away, but was blocked by the nurse, who bowed awkwardly to the Praetor.

"The Lady Yuna may have visitors now."

Baralai stood to the side of the infirmary and let Yuna's friends enter before him. Paine was first. She stood in the doorway unsure of what to do. Her concern and love for Yuna battled her other emotions that Paine had directed at her that day. As is the case with good friends, her love won out over all else. She stood by the end of the bed, staring in disbelief at all the Machina attached to her friend. When Gippal entered the room he went as pale as Yuna and dry-retched a couple of times. His confidence had deserted him. He took a seat at the bedside and held Yuna's hand, shaking a little. Finally Rikku walked into the room. Her reaction was somewhat similar to Baralai's own, earlier that day. She entered the room, walking stiffly like a zombie. She took in the sight of all the bruises and bandages, the Machina, the worried faces of her companions. Gravely, Rikku surveyed the situation. She sat beside Gippal and smoothed a lock of hair from Yuna's face before tenderly tracing a bruise that had formed on her jaw, her eyes filled with tears.

"Hi Yunie."

She reached into her sleeves and pulled out a comb, which she began to ease through Yuna's hair.

"I always feel better when someone does my hair. I bet you haven't been all prettied up since you got here." She said conversationally to her cousin.

Paine wordlessly sat opposite Rikku, who passed her a nail file and a bottle of pale pink nail polish. She picked up Yuna's hand and began to smoothen out a few rough edges. After a few moments, Gippal got up and began straightening the pillows and the blankets and fluffing them up a bit. He pulled Yuna's boots out from under the bed and began to polish them with a cloth he pulled out of his shirt.

It was Baralai's turn to feel insecure. He didn't feel it was appropriate to just go barging in on their little domestic scene that was unfolding. He wanted to do something though, but he could only think of flowers to brighten up the room. Flowers were pretty hard to come by at sea, so his idea was basically dead before it got off the ground. After a couple of minutes, he couldn't stand it any more, so he left the room. Sitting outside, he tipped his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. It would have been so much easier if he had fallen for Paine, but he knew that wasn't going to happen. There were so many damn old questions, which he kept trying repeatedly to answer, as well as new ones that seemed to surface every time he let his mind wander. What would happen when they reached Bevelle? Would they all just abandon him to his duties? When Yuna woke up, would she love him back? Why did he have so many doubts? He dragged himself into his room and forced himself to do paper work for a few hours, before he collapsed into his bed, with the disheartening feeling that life was starting to repeat itself.

* * *

A/N: Thankyou very much for all the great reviews! They make me really happy. Just so you know, I've written the previous chapter, this chapter and the next one in Maths class, so that's why they're appearing so quickly. Maths, got to love it...

Love,  
Corrupt.


	11. I need you so much

_On silent summer evenings, a certain sunlight in her eyes_

_I walk through the pavement of life again_

_I've got a warm feeling_

_I can't escape_

_It could last forever_

_into our own world_

_where everyone sleeps_

_and silence is deeper than water_

_I love her like no other_

Baralai woke up bright and early the next morning feeling a lot more energised. He had a quick shower and pulled on his heavy robes once again. In just a few hours they would be in Bevelle, In Spira's jewel, and all would finally be decided.

Baralai stood in the doorway of the kitchen, looking on in amusement as Gippal made his breakfast: a very strong smelling coffee, a rather large slab of omelette, a good shovel of bacon, A Grilled tomato, a sausage and three hash browns. He put his plate on the bench and pulled up a chair.

"Morning."

Baralai poured himself a glass of orange juice and sat next to his friend.

"You too."

No more was said for a little while. Gippal somehow shovelled in that monstrous amount of food in less than a minute and started on his seconds with a brilliant repeat performance. Baralai took a sip of his drink, feeling slightly sick.

"You'll get fat if you keep eating like that, you know." He commented, sounding brighter then he actually felt.

Gippal finished the second plate and drained the cup of coffee. He then proceeded to lean back in his chair quite casually and burped loudly.

"Excuse me." He said, petting his stomach. "I won't get fat, I work it all off." Gippal smirked. "Besides, it's not MY fault you have good cooks here." He stretched for a few seconds and propped his ankle up on the knee of his opposite leg, peering at Baralai in a critical way.

"I think you're the one that needs the food, my friend. Don't they feed you in Bevelle?"

Baralai ran his hands through his hair and laughed a quiet laugh, shaking his head.

"Gippal, the cooks on the boat are some of the people that work in St. Bevelle."

Gippal even managed to look ashamed.

Baralai smirked a little and then sighed. It was now a familiar sound.

"Are Rikku and Paine awake? We should probably get them food before the boat docks..."

Gippal nodded and grabbed a few extra plates.

Rikku evidently hadn't moved from Yuna's bed all night. Her arms and head were snuggled up against Yuna's side, the comb lying on the sheets, forgotten. Paine was sprawled on a couch in the corner, staring at the ceiling. Gippal gently shook Rikku awake, putting the tray down, taking a seat and pulling her into his arms.

"I brought you something to eat, love." He said softly, rubbing her back.

Baralai stood there feeling very awkward, until Paine came up to him. She took the tray he had prepared for her and left the room. The Praetor shook his head, feeling a little dazed, before taking a seat on the other side of the bed from the young Al-Bhed couple. He looked into Yuna's face and tried to remember all the promises he'd made to her and himself. At the time he hadn't realised how hard it would be to fulfil them. He would keep on trying though. He had to. Baralai took Yuna's hand and softly traced the lines in her palm. She looked so peaceful lying there.

"We'll get you better soon, I promise."

_Oh I, I never can tell_

_just how much I need to recite_

_I never can tell, just how hard it is to write down_

_But I'll pray every day for a glimpse of your fortunate smile_

_And I'll pray every day for a glimpse of your fortunate smile_

In Bevelle, Baralai retreated to his apartment immediately after Yuna had been admitted into the hospital. He just didn't know what else to do. Although things had definitely mended with Gippal, his situation with Paine was now rather awkward. Besides all of that, Baralai just felt like he was an intruder of some sort in their little family. It wasn't the nicest feeling he'd ever experienced at all.

In his study Baralai felt strangely comforted. He was amongst good company of the old books and scrolls that lined the dusty shelves. He pulled a stack of favourites from the shelves and sneezed. He'd definitely been neglecting his studies for awhile for the dust to get that bad. Dragging the books into the lounge room he paused to look at the view. His apartment, apart from The Heart of St Bevelle, was the highest point in the city and he had a magnificent view. It helped a lot that his outward facing windows were mostly floor to ceiling. Tinted of course. He sat down on the comfortable lounge to read and by the time he was pulled out of his trancelike state by the doorbell, the day had flown past. He'd begun at 9.30 am and it was 5.30 PM. As he stumbled to the door, his stomach grumbled. Maybe this was why he was so thin.

Behind the door was Gippal. Baralai greeted him warmly and Gippal strolled in casually, looking around in appreciation. He whistled.

"Nice place you have here, B. You've done well." He said, staring out the window.

Baralai scrambled around, blushing a little, trying to clear all the texts so it was tidy.

"I'm lucky my parents lived here, I suppose." He said breathlessly, emerging from the study.

"I could use a drink. Would you like one?" Baralai offered politely, wiping his brow.

Gippal sat down on the lounge and stuck his feet up on the coffee table. He could really use a 'drink'.

"Sure, Hit me with a bourbon and cola, B."

Baralai grinned sheepishly.

"Uh..."

Gippal snorted.

"Lightweight... Ok, coffee then."

Baralai spread his hands, going red. Gippal's jaw dropped.

"You've GOT to be joking!"

The Praetor went to the fridge and pulled out a jug of apple juice and grabbed a couple of glasses. Gippal sat forward in his seat and dropped his feet off the table.

"Cocoa?" He begged desperately.

"Fresh out."

Defeated, Gippal flopped back into the chair and put his feet back up.

"Fine. I'll have some damn apple juice."

Baralai smirked and pulled a six pack of beer, imported from Bikanel Desert, and threw a bottle to Gippal.

"I bought these for you for the meeting we have scheduled, but since you're here early..."

Gippal grinned that typical, charmers grin and used the edge of the table to hit off the lid of the beer.

"Ever the practical Praetor."

A few minutes later, when they'd drunk a bit and exchanged some small talk, Gippal put down his drink.

"Come have dinner with us tonight, B?" He asked, cracking his knuckles. Baralai looked at him thoughtfully.

"You'll get Arthritis if you keep that up." He paused. "Yuna's in hospital and you're all going out to dinner?" he questioned, feeling a little edgy.

Gippal nodded, starting to feel guilty about the whole idea.

"Well Yeah... Her pupils are responding to light and a Machina that measures brainwaves says she's started dreaming. She'll be awake any day now, I bet!" He said enthusiastically, ignoring the pang in his stomach. Baralai shook his head.

"Well things aren't very good with Paine and I at the moment. I imagine this isn't the best time to aggravate the situation, but if I were you I'd want to be there when Yuna wakes up."

Gippal definitely felt awful now.

"I do... More than anything, but we're just trying to have fun and pretend we're all ok for awhile, you know?"

"I know." There was that word again.

It was around seven when Baralai tired of being reclusive and staying in his apartment. He didn't know what to do with his time though. He definitely didn't feel like going to dinner and pretending to be ok. He didn't think he could handle sitting there with Yuna, lying there so silently, either. He needed to get his anger out physically. In his room he reached under the bed for his sparring rod. Instead of his hand closing around the object, it smashed into something solid. Wincing, he pulled out a heavy looking trunk. It was huge. He wiped away the dust, sneezing again as he read the label.

"Baralai's Childhood Memories."

He felt strange as he remembered the times in his life he'd had parents around to support him. Now he remembered why he'd put the damn chest under the bed in the first place. Still, he opened the lid of the trunk. The first object was a scrapbook of his finger paintings and glitter clogged collages from primary school. Then there was a leather bound book with a golden crest upon the cover that contained his all of his reports and certificates since he'd begun his schooling. He flicked through it, with a fair amount of pride at the fact that all of his marks were Excellent or Higher. There were a couple of children's books, a wooden duck with wheels that could be pulled by a string and a couple of model Chocobos. There was a huge velvet book. It was filled with photos and letters from his parents. He hadn't read them yet. He wasn't sure when he was going to either. Baralai picked up a small, bundle of cloth that had been on top of everything else and unravelled it.

It was a small stuffed Moogle, with an antenna that looked ready to drop off. Baralai's jaw dropped. It couldn't be! Holding it tightly in his hands, he thought back to the day Sin had been defeated by Braska and paused. The little girl he had talked to had lost her father that morning... Brown hair, mix matched eyes, a big beaded earring. It had to be! There was too much supporting evidence for it to be anyone else... Changing into more commonplace clothes, he tucked the Moogle into his jacket and walked out.

Baralai wasn't too sure what to think as he walked through the streets. This was so strange just seemed to tie all of his feelings and suspicions up. Maybe it was rash, but it definitely felt right now. Baralai scolded himself for being soft and thinking all romantically before he even knew that he was in a situation that required romantic thinking. Then again it did make him feel all warm inside, like a toasted marshmallow, which he liked. He decided he'd think whatever he wanted... Within respectable limits of course. Baralai grinned. He had an idea.

_A timeless place, I hope to reside_

_A beautiful life, is here for a time_

_I never felt like this_

_I would call upon the heavens_

_for your innocent words_

_Your beautiful ways, your heavenly presence_

When he walked into the hospital room, his heart hopped nervously even though Yuna was still obviously way out to the world. Baralai sat on the edge of the bed.

"I thought I'd come and see how you were. Since the others went out to have dinner I figured you might like some company." He smiled softly. "Well, that's not all I wanted to talk about... Today I was thinking about a few years ago when I was eight or so. Sin had just been defeated and my parents took me around the city so we could celebrate. I really wanted to see the fireworks, so we went up to a park that overlooked the city, so we'd have a good view. I was only there for a few minutes when I noticed this pretty girl crying. That made me sad and I wanted her to be happy so much that I went and bought her ice cream and stole a flower. It seemed to make her happy. Well, we sat there for awhile and ended up watching the fireworks together. I liked her so much and I was so proud I'd managed to make her happy. I had to go home then, but we arranged to meet the next day, but she never came. I was really sad because I wanted to see her again. She'd left her Moogle on the bench and I wanted to give that back too."

He moved her arm gently and tucked the Moogle under it and smiled very gently.

"I'm sorry it took me so long."

_Oh I, I never can tell_

_Just how much I need to recite_

_I never can tell, just how hard it is to write down_

_But I'll pray every day for a glimpse of your fortunate smile_

_And I'll pray every day for a glimpse of your fortunate smile_

Baralai grabbed something he'd left in the hallway.

"I got you some flowers too." He told her, putting them in a vase by the bed. He chuckled a little embarrassedly. "I stole them from the same planter box too..."

He sat back down on the bed and sighed.  
"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I wish you would wake up so we could go get ice cream or something like that..." Baralai touched Yuna's face softly and stood up. "But I don't know, Yuna. Maybe I've already wasted my share of miracles."

_And now and then, we'll go down to the park_

_You never know what you might find there after dark_

_'Cause heaven, is right there in your eyes, your eyes, your eyes_

_But I'll pray every day for a glimpse of your fortunate smile_

_And I'll pray every day for a glimpse of your fortunate smile_

_Heaven is right there in your eyes._

_Fortunate Smile ©2003 T.Noonan_


	12. You put me in a trance

And so it was that the Baralai diligently fell back into his duties as The Praetor of New Yevon and the protector of Bevelle, taking to the heavy workload like a Blitzer to water. Sure enough he'd had an afternoon of luxurious reading to himself, he hadn't really attended to his paperwork in a long time. A little more than a week if he remembered correctly. Baralai was a serious man by nature but he was human enough to admit he was being entirely ridiculous. He stretched out his legs and leaned back in the chair, laughing softly. On the inside, somewhere, he was still the young man who enjoyed to laugh and have fun, a free spirit. It was true he possessed an extended vocabulary for someone his age, indeed, for people older than himself. He also admitted that he would rather spend the day reading or writing instead of drinking (Gippal), shooting (Gippal), hooning around in Machina (Gippal) or tending towards the promiscuous lifestyles (Gippal)... But no matter how much he tended to hide behind these different sides of himself, he could never quash that spirit. He could scold himself as much as he liked for not keeping on top of the paperwork, but he knew that paperwork was the reason he'd taken the boat to Luca. It was the simple reason of the fact it would keep him away longer. He glanced at the calendar, realising with a shock that it had been around four days since he had visited Yuna in the Bevelle Hospital. Lately, he would sit down for what he intended to be a few hours and a few days would go by instead.

He drank the remainder of the iced tea that sat by his elbow and absently placed the glass on the shelf above his desk. He didn't place it far enough towards the wall and it fell to the desk and shattered. His first reaction was to shift the paperwork then scramble to clear the glass shards. A moment later, however, he felt a sting in his lip, so he pressed his fingertips to his mouth and made his way to the bathroom. While he rummaged in the drawers for cotton wool and antiseptic, he looked up and saw himself. It was a strange sensation, not recognising the person in the mirror. Baralai slowly let his fingers drop from his lips and the objects fell from his other hand into the white, porcelain sink that was now stained with his crimson blood. His eyes were dark and moody, his hair and robes were dirty and dishevelled, his honey-coloured skin was paled and the stubble on his face was becoming painfully noticeable. Baralai couldn't even stand up straight, for Yevon's sake. He stared at the blood that was smeared on his hands. This wasn't who he was.

Forgetting about his lip, he exited the bathroom and wandered down into the main room. There was a handful of notes that had been thrust under his door and his Comm Sphere was flashing. He pressed the button to play out all the messages, before sitting down to flick through the notes he'd picked up.

"We're leaving to go out now B. We'll be at the, Crid ib Rikku! Please! One second! Ok sorry... We'll be at Moonlilies... Rikku! Heh... Uh... Gotta run..."

_To Baralai, Praetor of New Yevon,_

_Tromell Guado would be overjoyed if you could set aside some time to discuss relations between Guadosalam and Bevelle at the soonest possible date at your convenience...._

"Yo 'Lai, we had a good time out. Pity you didn't come. Looks like someone came by and brought Yuna some presents. Well, uh... See you soon. "

"Hi, Um, It's Rikku here! Well, Leblanc and Nooj are here, so you should come down and join the party! Seeya!"

_Lai, It's from Gippal. I don't know If you got the messages on your Sphere, and it looks like you're busy, but Leblanc and Nooj..._

Baralai crumpled that one up.

"B! Come on! Answer the door already!"

"Baralai, we've been past five times today and you're not answering.. We're getting worried... If you don't want to see us, just give me a call or whatever..."

Baralai sat up straight, feeling guilty.

"That's It Baralai!!! Maybe if you cared, you'd actually know that Yuna woke up this morning and that she was asking for you, but no...."

Baralai felt a little ashamed but after awhile his common sense and the relief he felt pushed his pride back down to it's normal, acceptable level. The Praetor reached for his Comm Sphere and called Gippal, who answered almost immediately. It appeared he was in a cafeteria of some kind.

"Baralai! Man, you look like shit. Are you okay?!"

Baralai wiped at the blood self-consciously.

"I'm sorry..."

Rikku's head appeared in the projected screen.

"Baralai! We're glad you're Okay and all, but you better shakey shake your way over here lickety split!"

Gippal wrestled the Comm Sphere off her.

"That's for sure... Where in Spira have you been? Yuna's been calling for you..."

Baralai blushed and averted his eyes.

"I.. I just felt weird while I was around... Like I was intruding..."

Something appeared to be attracting Gippal's attention outside of Baralai's viewpoint.

"Yeah, Yeah. Love does that. Well if you're gonna 'shakey shake' over here, you'd better do something first. It's called bathing. Oh, and shaving.... Cred, I have to go!"

Transmission ended.

Baralai sat there for a minute, cradling the Sphere in his hands.

"Love?"

Baralai managed to shower and shave safely in an amazingly short amount of time. He couldn't be bothered fixing his hair with the headband, so it naturally fell into soft spikes like it did while on the ship. He quickly picked a black, button up shirt and some baggy jeans before pulling his boots on underneath them and bolting out the door. So much for the calm, collected Praetor.

Gippal and Rikku caught him as he walked into the doors of the Hospital and towards Yuna's room and dragged him off in the opposite direction.

He shook them off him "Gippal! Rikku!"

Gippal shook his head.

"Uh uh. I bet you haven't eaten for awhile..."

Baralai glared at the Cafeteria sign as if that would fix everything.

"I'll eat later. I need to see her..."

Gippal rolled his eyes and strode away, jauntily, to see Paine who was idly browsing through books in the Gift Shop. Rikku however, sighed sympathetically.

"I know how you feel Baralai, but you have to take care of yourself too ya know. She's actually asleep, so you have some time to pack something in your stomach and explain things to me." Rikku winked and linked her arm with his, leading him back out of the Hospital. Baralai looked at her quizzically.

"Hospital food sucks." Rikku giggled and gestured to Gippal, who nodded.

They took seats at a nice little shop across the road that Baralai had never really noticed. He picked up a menu and read it while Rikku rummaged in her pockets for some Gil.

"They make a mean milkshake."

Baralai smiled wanly and handed over some Gil.

"I'll take your word for it today... I'll have... Vegetarian Lasagne with a small salad and a white wine."

Rikku's eyes sparkled. "Wine? Oooh, you're being indulgent aren't you?"

It was Baralai's turn to roll his eyes at her teasing, although he held back all manners of insults he could have played in return, and shrugged, acting convincingly hurt.

"You're right. I'll have a vanilla milkshake then."

Rikku pet his head playfully, although a little guiltily and skipped up to the counter.

She returned about ten minutes later with their food. After she took a sip of her Strawberry Milkshake and a bite out of her chicken salad, she leaned across the table and stared at Baralai speculatively.

"Ok, Tell me all about it."

He swallowed his bite of Lasagne. "About what?"

"About _Yuna_ silly!"

Rikku grinned victoriously. She knew she had won when Baralai flinched ever so slightly. If she wasn't such a trickster she would have missed it.

"Did Gippal...?"

"Nope! I figured it out all on my lonesome!"

"Well done." He said dryly.

Rikku smirked, but became serious, while she drank some more of the milkshake.

"So what are you going to say when you talk to her?"

Baralai sighed. "I don't know. I'm in extremely unchartered territory... And I don't want to hurt Paine, either..." He pushed a square of Lasagne around with his fork, avoiding Rikku's eyes. "There's a lot of people who wouldn't approve. If she does want me, we'd have to keep it quiet for awhile..."

Rikku smiled gently.

"Well it's worth it or it's not..."

Baralai met her eyes.

"It is. I love her, Rikku."

Rikku began to look at the Praetor differently. She'd always seen him as being somewhat emotionless and the like, but she'd had the chance to re-think her opinions. She decided that she quite liked him.

"Well how about we make it 'less talk, more eat' so we can go and do something about that, huh?"

* * *

Authors Note: Thank you so much for the reviews!!!!!!11111oneonetwo. I Love you all! I had exams for a few weeks and have been battling writers block, so it's great to be back.

Love,

Corrupt

Ps. Sirea, ur Yunalai is awesome! Don't give up on it!


	13. I'm just trying to understand

Baralai slipped a tip into the palm of the waitress that had cleared away their plates and began to walk in the general direction of the hospital, Rikku bouncing alongside with her braids flailing.

"So what are you going to say to Yunie when she wakes up?!"

The Praetor made a frustrated gesture with his hand and walked a little faster.

"I'm not sure. I have a lot of Poetry revised from my books. I'm positive that something I remember will be appropriate..."

Rikku snorted in a very unladylike manner.

"Oh great! You're going to _recite_ to her! How romantic!" She rolled her eyes. "I'm sure that Yunie's going to _adore_ the diplomatic approach!"

Baralai blushed and then frowned in annoyance, lengthening his strides.

"Forgive me for being new to this, Rikku." He shot back at the thief who pouted and grinned in quick succession, sidling up to him.

"Okay, Okay! I'm sorry! How about we skip the first question?" She paused. "Hmm... Okay! What are you going to give her for a gift?"

Baralai touched a hand to his forehead and growled. "Rikku..."

She bit her lip and scuffed the toe of her boot, innocently. When Baralai didn't relent, she sighed and offered another apologetic smile.

"Fiiine... Come with me and I'll give you a hand..." She grabbed Baralai's wrist and dragged him to the hospital. Because she was jogging ahead, she didn't see his mischievous and exultant smirk.

They stood by the entry to the gift shop, ignoring a couple of patrons who stood and gawked shamelessly.

"Okay!" Rikku said sharply. "I'm your teacher and I'm going to learn you good so that you major in Yunie!"

Baralai grinned, his amusement winning over the irritated side of his mind. "Sure thing, Teachie." If she wanted to dance, then he'd prove that he knew the steps.

Rikku scowled. "Shut up! Don't you backchat me!" She waggled her index finger in his face.

The Praetor massaged his forehead with one hand, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks. This was getting just a little embarrassing. There was playing and then there was some... The onlookers were kind of putting a dampener on his fun side.

"Rikku!" He whispered loudly. "I'm supposed to be the _Praetor_ here!"

The blonde girl stood there, lip twitching and eyes shining. "Fine then! Do it by yourself!"

"Yevon..." Baralai swore under his breath. He thought quickly, resisting the urge to scream. "I will! Some teacher you are..." He gave her a slightly disgusted look, shaking his head. He turned to a shelf, pretending to browse the books. He smirked again and counted down in his head. Three... Two... One...

"FINE! I'll help you, but you have to be nice. Okay?"

Just like he thought...

"Okay."

_Score..._

Twenty minutes later, they made their way to Yuna's room armed with a delicate silver bracelet and a bouquet of Moon Lilies. The bouquet he'd bought from the Hospital Florist had made a considerable hole in his wallet... Still, the lass at the counter had been so flabbergasted at having Baralai as a customer, he'd got the jewellery a for a third of what it was worth. There were certain advantages that being well known got you. Outside Yuna's room, Rikku stopped Baralai and peered around the door, being careful to stay hidden.

Lulu sighed wearily and continued to hold Yuna's hand firmly in her own, occasionally stroking it with her slender fingers. Yuna had woken up around midnight, delirious with shock and the fever that had cropped up. It was now late evening and the fever had begun to break. Yuna was finally sleeping. The former black mage gently replaced the overly warm hand onto the thin sheet and stretched, turning to her husband. Wakka was jammed in a chair with Vidina curled up in a borrowed cot, clutching a plush Chocobo. If an outsider were to walk in it would most probably appear that he didn't care that Lulu had stayed up all night. That definitely wasn't the case. The couple had discussed the situation at hand and they had decided that they'd have to take turns between being a parent or a sibling. Lulu made her way to the couch to smooth her husband's hair from his face and smiled for the first time in a few days. It was things like this that made it okay.

Wakka opened his dark eyes and smiled up at Lulu, pulling her down beside him.

"Hiya Gorgeous," He said sleepily, touching her face. "So Yuna's asleep now, ya?"

Lulu smiled appreciatively. "It took long enough. They're sure the fever is breaking, so she can sleep now."

Wakka stood up slowly and placed Vidina in a crib that was in the corner of the room. He returned to his seat and pulled Lulu into his lap.

Lulu closed her eyes and sighed. "You were lucky that Vidina was being a handful. It was horrible. She woke up and screamed for Gippal. I guess we looked so bad that she didn't believe he was alive until we managed to get a hold of him for her. Maybe it was the fever speaking? It must have been because after that she began moaning and crying about the Praetor of New Yevon. They had to knock her out with a tranquilliser," Lulu didn't bother to hide her confusion. ", I don't know why she mentioned him of all people..."

Wakka nodded in agreement.

"Well his boat picked her up right? But she wouldn't know about that would she? She never talks to that Yevon scum anyway, does she...? And-"

Lulu smiled into Wakka's shoulder and rolled her eyes slightly, before pulling back and placing her finger on his lips, effectively ending Wakka's protective tangent for a while.

"We can discuss it later. Right now, I think we should go to the room that we were booked and concentrate on other things..."

Wakka was a little confused as Lulu got up and scooped Vidina and his Toy from the cot.

"Like...What?"

His wife turned around, a serene smile on her face, red eyes shining.

"Like being a family...."

She left it hanging for a moment before re-balancing Vidina on her hips and taking Wakka's hand to lead him away.

Rikku hissed under her breath and gestured for Baralai, who was slightly pale with anger, to hide in the empty room adjacent to Yuna's. Lulu looked up quickly and her eyes opened wide in surprise.

"Rikku!"

The thief giggled nervously and linked her hands behind her back. "Hi Lulu! Want me to look after Vidina for the night?!?!" She asked on impulse.

Lulu smiled warmly and looked at Wakka, a strange look in her eyes.

"I think that's a lovely idea, Rikku. Thank you very much for suggesting it."

Wakka looked slightly confused but he put his arm around Lulu and smiled as Rikku carefully lifted the sleeping tot out of Lulu's arms. "Yeah, thanks a bunch Rikku. His carry bag is under the chair there..."

She giggled nervously again. "Ehehe, It's no problem at all! I didn't have any plans!" Well there goes clubbing with Gippal...

Wakka and Lulu thanked her again, linked arms and left. Rikku watched them walk down the corridor and out of sight before she breathed a sigh of relief. She motioned for Baralai, who was still obviously mad. Rikku was amazed that the fragile flowers were still intact. She patted him on the shoulder, comfortingly and sighed.

"Don't take it personally, Lai... Wakka used to be a Yevon fanatic." She laughed sadly. "He held it against my heritage a lot, until we uncovered the truth about Yu Yevon. Now he just has some huge grudge against anything Yevon... I'd forget about it."

Baralai nodded and smiled awkwardly. "I'd better, yes. I have a lot more to think about now..."

Rikku grabbed Vidina's overnight bag and Chocobo before pausing in the doorway.

"Good luck."

He watched her leave, before turning back to the silent figure in the bed. He was glad that Rikku's giggling hadn't woken Yuna up.

"Well... This is going to be a new experience, I'm sure..." He mumbled to himself.

He slowly approached the bed, toying with the silver and purple ribbons that encircled the bouquet and pulled up a chair. Now or never...

"Hey Yuna. It's time to get up now, beautiful."

His voice was so soft and cracked and somehow she heard him. Slowly her mixed matched eyes opened and focussed on his face. She smiled a little bewilderedly.

"Baralai?"

He returned the smile. "It's me."

Yuna relaxed into her pillows again.

"I'm glad."

After a moment Baralai showed her the flowers and placed them by her bed. His heart rate began to increase and he felt a little funny inside.

"I got you these. I hope you like them." He paused and searched his robes for the little silver box. He handed it to her, his wrist shaking. Yuna took the gift and opened it, her eyes wide and shining with surprise and delight.

"Oh my..."

Baralai's face lit up.

"Would you put it on for me, please?" Yuna asked, her voice light.

He took the bracelet and attempted to do the clasp, his hands fumbling and his face getting increasingly redder. Finally, he succeeded and drew his hand away. Yuna held up her wrist, admiring the delicate chain and the intricate Moon Lily charms that dangled from it to make a pleasant shimmering sound.

"I-I hope you like it, I mean, I can change it if you want..."

Yuna shook her head as vigorously as her condition would allow.

"Don't you dare! It's lovely..." She admired the bracelet for another moment before letting her hand fall. She sighed softly and looked up into Baralai's deep brown eyes, a gentle smile turning up the corners of her mouth. "You can kiss me, if you like. I won't yell at you this time. I promise..."

Baralai looked up sharply from her hands, blushing for what felt like the hundredth time that day.

"Yuna..." He could barely speak now.

"I've had a lot of time to think lately," she said gently. ", And I realised that you made me happy. I didn't want to admit it... Baralai, when I turned you away that night, I wasn't thinking. Maybe I was thinking too hard... Either way, I wanted to say that I'm sorry... I wanted to be with you so badly..." A lone tear slid down her cheek.

Baralai brushed the tear away with the back of his index finger, before cupping her face in the same hand. His expression was intense and honest when he answered her, his eyes locked on hers.

"Yuna... It doesn't matter. I've never felt this way before about anything or anyone... I think I would endure anything to be with you right now..."

After that moment, everything fell into place just as it should. Yuna smiled as Baralai leaned in, wonder evident in her expression, before slowly closing her eyes and surrendering herself to his kiss.

* * *

Authors Note: Awwww!! Well I know this is a long time coming... There have been a lot of reasons. Some are personal, but the main reason is that my Notebook has been freezing, blue screening and randomly shutting itself down every five minutes or so. Ask any of the SF people, they'll tell you!!! Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I tried very hard to pull it off. I was very blocked about how to get it right...

Love,

Corrupt.


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